Good morning!
Here is the dilemma:
So much to tell, and not too much time to talk (well, type) as I am at work. Ah, to hell with it. I'll spill all the beans! LOL!
Where to start. Well, let's get the weight out of the way.
I am at a new low again. I don't really know any longer if I am happy or unhappy about that. I have found my sweet spot, I feel, and I am SO comfortable at this weight. I really don't want to get heavier.
At the same time, I am pretty sure I am losing some muscle mass from not eating enough. I try, hard, but it just doesn't happen. Even when I go have fun, I am low!
I don't want to eat just to eat, though. I want to eat when I feel that my body wants food. This is what I have fought to learn over the last year, and I really don't want to get into binging just to get the proteins. As much as I realize that I need more protein to build muscle, just as much do I not want to go back towards bad habits that got me in trouble in the first place.
I know it's a dilemma. I know I gotta work on it. But at the same time, I feel physical improvements where I am going right now.
When I look at myself in the mirror, or even when I look at my hands and arms right now, I can see that I am thinner. My hands are skinnier, and I'm assuming this is more fluids than fat that is coming off me.
...
I did do better on the eating yesterday. I had breakfast, a 2nd breakfast smoothie, half a grilled chicken for lunch, pita with beef, lettuce and dressing for dinner. Not too bad.
Since the sun was shining, and we were all excited about the evening, whilst waiting for the time to pass, wife and I decided that it would be a very good day to find a bench in the sun and enjoy a cup of coffee and an ice cream. It was such a nice thing on such a nice day.
I ended up at a total of about 2200 calories - more than I have reached on a normal day for a while. Not too bad.
The down side to that is that today I have zero hunger. I had about haft the breakfast I made this morning, and I have no urge for 2nd breakfast. I don't want to eat just to be eating, so next meal will be lunch.
Lunch will be leftover chicken soup from Tuesday, and thus low calorie - about 175 calories for a huge portion. I will have no trouble living off of this for the time until dinner.
Dinner will probably be another pita. Depending how hungry I am, I might ask for a larger version, but as I am going to work at the gym straight from my daytime job, it will have to be something that I can pick up on the way and eat fairly quick. Pita it is.
There is a little birthday bash here at work, in a few minutes. I will see what they serve, and maybe have a little something if I find it appealing.
EDIT:
Nothing appealing at the b-day bash. At all. Just bread, bread and more bread. Just white bread. Thanks, but no thanks.
So, looking at my calculations for the day, without even aiming for it, I'm doing another Low Cal Day. That's ok. I'll have an easier weekend, and I will have no issues having a fun time going out tomorrow. More on that later!
END OF EDIT:
...
I am so excited to go work at the gym today. Today is my first day there alone, and I am in no way intimidated by it. It's really cool to start a job like this with nothing but confidence. I'm sure I'll run into things that I didn't expect, but I am in no way scared of it. BRING IT ON!
...
So... last night...
It. Was. AWESOME!
We went to the "Wednesday Jam" yesterday. Basically, it's a bunch of people showing off for each other, playing in bands, doing jam sessions, fun stuff.
We went with two projects in mind - a jam between my band and my brother's band, and - more importantly - the live premiere of my band, Burnin' Live!
It went SO well, both sets. We played Kid Rock's All Summer Long and a Danish rock song as jams. They were fun, and pretty energetic. Wife didn't care for it, but listening back on it on recordings, I found it really fun. I liked it.
But Burnin' Live! was amazing! It was a blast to finally get to present everything to people, and even if there was a few mistakes, and a poorly assembled drumkit that fell apart(!) on the drummer, we did well. People liked it, and we LOVED playing.
We were set up for three songs, but ended up playing four.
The whole thing was recorded, and as soon as I get the video, I will sync it up with the much better sounding audio for a nice presentation. I can't wait to show you guys!
It was a LONG day - up at 4 AM, and in bed again around 11 PM, just to be up again at 4 AM this morning, to be at work until 9 PM tonight. Then tomorrow up at 4 AM, and then I'm gonna be moving until WAY too late. But more about that tomorrow. :)
...
Today, I'm thankful for.
- The most AWESOME day yesterday. Thank you to everyone that made it possible.
- Coffee, coffee, coffee. I'm gonna need it.
- The outlook to a beautiful day. The sun is shining, and will continue shining every day this week. I like.
Have a great day! Life is good - and FUN!
