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today i pretty much hate my body. i'm an empowered woman with a master's in business and a great new job, and i still hate my body. i should be writing about how i have control over things, how i workout regularly, try to eat a balance of whole grains, protein and essential nutrients, but right now, i'm just not feeling it.
i think we all have these days.
it doesn't help when a little monster inside tugs at that fat left on your stomach and belly, highlighting your imperfections.
a long time ago, i thought i was over all of this. but no, you don't escape everyday pressure to be perfectly lean, have great hair, flawless skin, etc. i just want to be taken seriously, so socially, when you're objectified, it's frustrating.
at the end of the day, 110-115 is a great weight range for someone my height, but i'm still not a VS model and only implants and some serious calorie-restriction will get me there. none of which i think is a good idea. i remember dropping the pounds before i got married and feeling really good about myself back then. i had a great support system with plenty of positive reinforcement. now, i live with the disapproving glares and veritable diet/exercise watch. it's driving me crazy and it makes me want to stay home sometimes. but then again, the more i'm out, the more attention i get for looking good.
i'm going to have a good cry session tonight. screw it.
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