FullaBella's Journal, 05 November 2019

Dear Mojo,

Welcome back buddy. I don’t know where you’ve been; I’m just very happy you’ve returned. I’ve been mostly successful during the days but totally failing at night without you.

I won’t go into a long, unnecessary confessional of insane eating. I’ll just repeat that I’m glad you’ve returned and thank you for getting me through a night without stalking the kitchen.

Let’s do it again tonight, shall we?

Sincerely,

Me

PS - Maybe the secret of getting the Mojo to come back is making a good choice on my own. Yesterday, at the doc’s office, ((which ALWAYS affects my mood negatively)) I was reflecting on the past month leading up to a totally out of control week of eating and thought, “Well, may as well order & indulge a pizza before I get back to eating on plan”.

I guess that stupid thinking was like a bat signal for Mojo because it came back & said, “uh, how about RIGHT NOW? Go home, make a good meal, and move on with your day.”

The Sacrificial Pizza? Or Melissa posting an inspiration I’d shared in the past but obviously forgotten. Either way - yesterday was a good day. Here’s to another and another for all of us.


Sending a little toast to all of my friends here too, okay?




Diet Calendar Entries for 05 November 2019:
1557 kcal Fat: 85.05g | Prot: 110.68g | Carb: 71.66g.   Breakfast: Organic Kombucha Berry Nirvana, High Country Goji Berry Kombucha, Coffee, Land O'Lakes Heavy Whipping Cream, Land O'Lakes Traditional Half & Half. Dinner: Chives, Mushrooms, Baby Spinach, Cherry Tomatoes, Aldi Blue Cheese Crumbles, Wal-Mart Top Sirloin Steak, The Deli Counter Smoked Ham, Great Value Jumbo White Eggs. Snacks/Other: Smoked Turkey Sausage, Boiled Egg, Libby's Crispy Sauerkraut. more...
2171 kcal Activities & Exercise: Sleeping - 24 hours. more...

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Comments 
Thank you Liv, Eva, Princess &Adult. Are you talking about 'disguised toast'? Or do I need more coffee? (Well, that's a rhetorical question, I always need more coffee.. until I don't.) 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Eagle Eye Keyten!! Thank you for the kind words. For the disclaimers: this was 5 years, 20lbs and a different hair color ago. I'm hoping for a one year before/after in Jan2020. But there. That's me. Mystery solved. Hearts broken. Minds blown. Fantasies melted. Eyes tortured. Hahahahahahah 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Beautiful new pic! 😍😍😍 
06 Nov 19 by member: EvaSieteTres
Thank you again. I'm going to share something - more than you asked or really want - but just putting that photo up last week (the one w/the gun) was very triggering for me. Everyone was very kind but I kept shaking me head the entire time. I'm NOT being solicitous. I'm not being self-effacing. This is just years of the script running in my head. So I had a BAD week of eating in reactions to the emotions of it. Weird, I know. Esp in this day & age of selfies selfies selfies. But I survived the week. Found my Mojo again. And there. A photo. This is way bigger for me than most people will ever know. But I did it. And I appreciate your kindness and support. Thank you. End sob story. 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Thank you Eva. Thank you. 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Ha - I just saw the pun in my comment. Gun/Triggering/ hahaha. I crack myself up. 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
I do the same thing "Might as well order a pizza and then go back on plan". And it's usually after a doctor appointment!  
06 Nov 19 by member: Fritzy 22
More than 1/2 my calories are from candy so far today and I didn't go to the gym as planned this morning and I'm not going tonight and I'm thinking of what restaurant to go to...and I don't care and I'm not looking to be talked out of it. So don't feel bad! Glad you got your mojo back. Hope mine is only gone for today. We'll see.  
06 Nov 19 by member: davidsprincess
Yeah - that was my son in law holding the camera. He has long arms and got me on a good angle. But because I've never been considered a looker I've never paid much attention to my photos. I probably put way too much emphasis on it that way. That's why I finally just tossed it out there. It is what it is. Right? 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Fritz - yep, this was the knee doctor just shaking his head that five injections & $$$$$$ & PAIN later, I'm still the same as when I climbed down this rabbit hole in ... June? July? So.. CRAP... may as well have a pizza. But I didn't. Not that day.  
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
Princess - I wouldn't dare try to talk you out of anything.We are who we are and over the internet influence is minimal. You make those decisions yourself and you've done so outstanding I'm not about to presume to advise. Where are you going for dinner? 
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
IDK, Bella- But that picture of the deep dish giordano's pizza floating around has my wheels spinning.  
06 Nov 19 by member: davidsprincess
I've not seen that one but you had me at 'deep dish'. I am still on the hunt for a really good really deep really cheesy pizza.  
06 Nov 19 by member: FullaBella
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