hoosier436's Journal, 07 November 2014

I understand the frustration, I've gained the past couple weeks. Hang in there, don't give up, don't give in, just keep at it and redouble your efforts. :) 

I agree with Jim - no sense in being too too frustrated, be it, let it go, then redouble efforts as Jim says. I mean, it isn't going anywhere without our refocus - and 1.7 could be almost anything - you can knock that off with a solid week.  

thanks you thank you for your support that is very kind of you <3 and your words were welcome <3 I'm a Jesus freak I Love him so much and he has taught me so much <3 like those words failure <3 oh boy I was born in to a family who the whole neighborhood called failure even at school , Mom had boyfriends dad was a violent drunk I was the oldest of 5 brothers who became very wild and for some reason I took it apond myself to save the family ,,giggling a really big job ,, I have always been a praying person even as a child ..I remember asking the Lord for help ,, I dated a fellow from 14 -17 y o whom I was severely co-dependent on (( I didn't understand that at the time )) when he broke up with me , his dad found out about our family and he told his son I was no good like my family ,, after our break up I was now convences I was know good well I'll show them what know good is ,,, the drinking the drugs the men ,, for about 4 years I lived a very bad life ,, then my best friend who had faith in me always <3 she was more like a mom <3 to me <3 I was 21 years old living with a motorcycle guy with my son from my first marriage (( my first ex went to prison )) I got a call from my mom she told me Debbie died birth control killed her ,, her lungs were filled up with blood clots she died on the spot ,, crazy thing was 2 days before she died her dad came to her in a dream (( he died a year before she did )) and her dad told her he was going to help her across and she truly believed it ,, and she was gone 2 days after ,, through her death I gave my life to Jesus Christ and have Loved the Lord ever since ,, I did become Luke warm at times and even back slide back in 1999 after my marriage fell apart after 25 years together ,, went right back to drinking and smoking pot ,, when I finely came to my senses and learned about codependents and unhealthy boundaries ,, I fell in Love with the Lord again and I pay I never run from him when I'm upset but run to him he really has never let me down <3 with Gods words in my heart by reading his words he has taught me all have fallen short of his Glory all have gone astray so now after years of reading his word I dont feel like a failure any more oh it may try and creep back into me but I know its coming from Hell <3 I'm now the righteousness of Christ in faith ,,, no longer a failure .. its been quit an journey for me but having faith and renewing my mind has saved my life ,,, I didn't read till I was 21 years old got my GED in my late 40's went to college in my 50's got above a 3.4 and was on the deans list for medical coding and insurances billing ,, I tried to find a job in that filed but the truth was i was to old ,, for them to hire me ,, so Now I'm a school bus driver and I Love it <3 PLEASE JUST KNOW THIS WERE EVER THAT LABEL CAME FROM ,, writing on a piece of paper who called me a failure ?? and write it down and forgive them and burn it and writ down all the awesome things about you <3 have a Blessed day <3 bright and shining star that you are God dont make junk