hoosier436's Journal, 05 July 2014

Your weight history just switched to yellow! Keep going! We want to see it turn green next! 

The ups and downs do stink, but you just gotta keep rolling - you can see it has already been worth it, and it will continue to get better. Don't agonize over the one day at McD's - you have to have a "treat" now and then. Just figure out how it works into your weekly plan. You're doing great; don't let the doubts get you down! 

Hang in there, you've done very well. The thing to remember with emotions is that they pass. Today's a new day, make it the best you can. 

Sounds to me that you have things under control. Remember, You didn't fill your cart with junk food after having that big temptation and when you went to McD's, you didn't continue like you would have in the past by hitting a dunkin doughnuts or dairy queen afterwards. Hell, even your meal at McD's was probably half of what you would have had in the past. I know a trip to McD's for me when I was out of control was at least 2 Big Macs, 6 pc nugget, large fries and a Shake. Your ability to realize that you were off your "menu" and you did not over indulge is a great sign that your turning a new leaf. Keep up the good work! 

Very insightful journal today, my friend! I really empathize. Just remember that, although your wife loves you and supports your efforts, there is still no way she can know what it is like to be you - inside your head with this up & down battle. Family dynamics and understanding those dynamics with clarity are a vital part of our continuing campaign. The fact that you RECOGNIZE your own response to your wife's observations is GOOD. There are so many times that my mesomorph, athletic husband says, "Oh, we CAN'T eat there because you CAN'T have that," and I think, "If I had a dangerous peanut allergy that could cause my airways to close off, my husband might be more empathetic." Hold your head up. Pull up your boot straps, and let's march onward!  

Have your wife act as your Dietician. Tell her you need for her to monitor your portions. Amazon sells "Jokari Healthy Steps Portion Control Diet / Weight Loss 5pc Kitchen Utensils Tool Set " that is about $35. Once you get your mind around what you want for yourself, the rest will fall into place. Never doubt yourself, you can do anything you put your mind to. And yes, it is healthy to "vent." Hang in there it is like dancing, once you get the steps...the routine is a piece of cake. YOU CAN DO IT!!! 

Don't forget about that dr visit you posted about recently and let that motivate you to keep going! As you get more used to your new eating habits, it will be less difficult for your family to have ice cream and other things in the house without it affecting you. I recommend always keeping some good snacks, though... eating salad when you have the "munchies" is not very satisfying. I like to eat seeds or nuts in the shell (like sunflower seeds or pistachios) because it gives me something to do with my hands while I'm eating them, which I've discovered satisfies my desire to snack for a while without ending up eating too much. Frozen popsicles are pretty good, too. 

Thanks for the reminder Absynthia.. I am remembering.. but like I said.. it is like a roller coaster.. I am committed to the new life style change-- no question bout it-- but there are days that I want (not will) to give up....  

I was going about my day and one of your posts popped into my head about you really are working so hard (and this isn't easy!) and how you sometimes felt so weak. I wanted to check in to see how you were doing. Looks like you are still doing really good! I have the same things going on myself. I still try to make good choices for my meals and when the scale goes up instead of down, it feels so.. impossible sometimes. I know people say the scale is just a number and while I do feel better in my clothes, that number is like telling me "you did good yesterday", "good job saying no to that bag of Oreos".. whatever it is. I know the scale won't always go down even if I do things perfectly, but that scale DOES hold me accountable. I know when I step on and am surprised by what I see, I usually know I shouldn't be all that surprised. I'm very serious about my weight right now and I have my goal ahead of me and I am trying to stay focused too. It's hard sometimes. I do miss [insert incredibly awesome, super yummy high calorie thing here]. Even on days I say, "You know what, I am just going to eat what I want," I find that I still can't bring myself to order that Quarter Pounder or that large fry or that Steak bagel, a big plate of sketti and sausage.. ugh. There are days I want to give up too. I have to believe that is what everyone goes through. Lately the scale has not been my friend, days I have eaten really well, stayed below my limit and it went up. It's been a bummer of a time but I know these are the times where it is most important to find motivation in myself. Giving in would change nothing. I lowered my calorie limit by about 300 to see if that helps me out, personally. I just wanted you to know you really are doing so great and being weak is human, lots of us are on that roller coaster. My husband is calorie counting too. He is down almost 15 lbs. I am so proud of him. Sometimes it's great to have a partner and sometimes it's someone that can make you question your strength. If they aren't doing the right thing, maybe I don't have to. Yes, I have to. He has a lot more calories than I do so that can be hard that he can have a little more of something than I can "and get away with it." Breakfast I will have egg, a couple egg whites and maybe 2 pieces of bacon.. he can have 3 eggs, bacon and an english muffin. That's hard sometimes too, even when he is doing the right thing. This proves no matter what, it isn't easy. Be proud you choose the foods you do and of the difference you are making for yourself and for your wife :)