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Tonight I am angry. My husband and I went to a seminar and afterwards they had lots of "good" food - pizza, wings, brownies, a yummy looking dessert with cool whipped topping, corn on the cob, etc.
I went to a table to sit with the wife of friends and then we went to go see the end on the Cavs/Wizards game. When it was over, everyone got plates of food - but my husband just stood there and said, "Ready to go"? I told my friend were were leaving - she knew I wasn't happy.
Don't get me wrong, I am was not hungry. But I wanted that food. I wanted a piece of pizza. A wing. I wanted to sit around and talk and fellowship with our friends. But since I need to lose weight - and my husband has lost 14 lbs in the last month and is on a roll. There was no staying, no eating, no sitting around with friends.
And it makes me mad. Mad at him (he's like a food natzi at times), mad at my situation - I can't eat and have fun because I need to lose 30 pounds. Just mad and upset. My friend was like, "Oh, you can't stay because of him." It was true but it wasn't. I was not hungry. I told her we had eaten dinner before we came and it was true. I was not hungry, in fact, far from it. But still I am upset with him. Just one piece of pizza. Just a wing or two. Would that really be so bad? But my hubby stands there seemingly all holier than thou - watching those people eat stuff that's bad for them.
As we were leaving and our friends were like, "Where are you going" he said, "You want to stay?" I was like, "No. I don't want to be sitting around while everyone's eating." That would be T-O-R-T-U-R-E. It's like having an alcoholic sit around in a bar with friends who are drinking.
THIS SUCKS. I hate where I am in my life as far as my weight goes. We haven't been intimiate in a month. I'm too fat, you know. It just sucks.
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