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12 February 2013

Weigh-in: 306.0 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 66.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
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15 January 2013

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13 January 2013

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12 January 2013

One thing I'm really thinking about is maintaining lifestyle changes. In the last year, we have succesfully switched to a flexitarian diet and then again with mostly success to a plant based diet version of flex. i joined a gym and have gone off and on and enjoy what I am doing when I am there. I started a new job and have been able to have the kind of schedule I've dreamed of. We are going to try and have another baby in 2013 and payoff debt now that we are in a better financial position.

Here is the challenge. As soon as an illness comes along, a life stressor, etc. I stop putting the extra effort into meal planning, working out, etc. Then when things settle down, I struggle "restarting." It's like I think I have my needs figured out but can't seem to change my ways for good.

Is stress management what i need? I regularly am in prayer/meditation, am fairly calm, very capable of navigating challenges, etc. Is it a coach I need? I'm just not sure what is missing.
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11 January 2013

I'm hoping to spend some of my self care time each day "playing around" on this site with the hopes of it providing motivation. Right now, I'm rebeling a bit as my workplace has decided to focus on caregiver obesity for 2013. It seems all the skinny people are sitting aroud talking about what the fat people should do. It not only frustrated me for my own situation but I can empathize with some of staff I care for. Ugh.

I also have a HUGE week coming up and I'm trying to decide what is managable for me this next week. Do I get back to the gym or wait a bit? Do I make things loose on the diet or try and do the normal? I will certainly be spending time in the chapel today praying for guidance.

When I wake up and find my husband has left for the gym at 4:45am it makes me feel guilty for this struggle I am having. I know he has a much easier time with daily tasks and I hate to compair myself to him, but I do. It makes me feel ashamed that I am not better at all of this.

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