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25 October 2012

Day 4 of my AdvoCare herbal cleanse. I feel good, and I've been exercising almost everyday this week. My weight last week was 213, which is still terrible, but it went down to 210 yesterday. I hope that I keep going down because I'm not doing so well at Legion Fitness.

Whenever I run at Legion Fitness, I'm always last. It's a terrible feeling not being able to keep up, but I keep telling myself I'll get faster... and I can only get faster if I decrease in weight and continue to run.

Angel's back! She started Saturday bootcamps two weeks ago, and I looked around at all the people who used to train with her... and we all got chunky. It was so sad. When she told us to jog, I was first. It's like everyone is starting over, and I'm just a little bit ahead, just a tad.

She said, "Wherever you are right now, that's it. It's OK. Get your head right." I'm trying really hard to get my head right like she told us, but I keep thinking how badly I need to get better at running. I feel like a car that's revving up, going in no particular path but a deepening circle: all frustration and fury all balled up in my gut. I just want to lose weight, that's all. And I want to stop eating badly, and I want to continue working out. I guess the question is, how bad do I want it?

25 October 2012

Weigh-in: 210.0 lb lost so far: 30.0 lb still to go: 70.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment gaining 0.1 lb a week

22 August 2012

19 August 2012

I went to six days of bootcamp this past week, so now Fred -- the co-owner of Legion Fitness -- calls me THE IRON MAN. I still run slow as hell, but I'm not last anymore. And even when I am, I don't care LOL I'm getting better, and I'm feeling better, and my only regret is that when school starts on Aug. 27, going six times a week will be a luxury.

The other bootcampers are in awe of how often I go. We're really not supposed to go that often; three days a week is what they put on their website for the low monthly fees, but as long as you pay your monthly fees, the instructors really don't care if you do the six workouts a week. In fact, Fred and his son have told me they're so impressed I come so often. Harrison, his son, told me last week, "Other people TALK about coming six days a week, but you, you don't even talk about it. You just go."

So here I am, after only one month, just so motivated to keep working out. Even if I can't work out with Legion, I'm going to go to the gym on my way to work in the morning. DaJuana scoffs at that and says she won't even entertain it because I won't do it, but I really don't need to prove anything to DaJuana. Angel always says, "Just do YOU." I'm just going to have to do ME then. I think working out at 5 to 6 a.m. will be OK because I can shower quickly afterwards and then go to work straight from there. I have first period off this year :)



07 August 2012

I am so going to miss 5:30 a.m. bootcamp when school starts. It was really difficult to get up at 4 and walk the dogs, then get dressed and go work out that early, but now that DaJuana and I have grown accustomed to it, we both feel like we're going to missing out a lot when we start school. *sigh*

I just really have to work on breathing right. A looooong time ago, when I used to train with Angel, it was a gradual improvement for me to be able to jog and sprint without passing out. Somehow, back then, I had found a way to breathe properly while running. This summer, I'm dumbfounded by the way I HUFF and PUFF, and it literally KILLS my pace. Within a few minutes of running, I'm breathless. The area right below my right ribs begin to hurt (what is THAT???). Of course, that slows me way down, and before I know it, the skinny running group is two street blocks away from me, and the worst part is that when they reach the end of the second block, they do a squat. And they wait. And wait. And they only get up from that squat when I get there.

Psychologically, that messes someone up. As for myself, I could throw up my hands and say, SCREW YOU, I'LL CATCH UP LATER... but that's so hard to say when you see a bunch of people squatting, waiting for YOU to get to them. The idea that a group of people will suffer during that time it takes you to get there, really makes you feel guilty. So, if you don't want to finish strong for yourself, your guilt makes you finish strong for the team. That's something I never had to deal with when we were doing bootcamp with Angel.

I'm starting to see results already, and it hasn't even been a month. My clothes are starting to fit again, although I really scold myself when I put my size 12 shorts on... and I can't button it up LOL That's my punishment for eating so badly and not working out consistently this past school year. But I know that if I keep eating right,exercising, and taking my AdvoCare supplements, I'll be able to fit those shorts in no time. It took me a school year to ruin myself; it will take me a while to get myself back. The good news is, I don't think it will take me another school year to be able to button up those shorts again. I give myself half that time. :)

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