I don't want to get into a lot of detail but I gained 50 lbs while pregnant with my twins. March 23rd my son died and I gave birth to my daughter. She then died the next afternoon. I had lost a little weight while in the hospital after surgery. Since I've been home I've gained. I feel terrible and just want to slowly change my like and get better for myself. I can't do anything to give them their lives back but I can't take back my own. I'm starting small, just getting to my pre-pregnancy weight, and then I'll go for a bigger over all goal. Small steps..