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30 September 2014

Still under 150, but seems like I am losing ground (again). Emotionally I feel overextended. Currently I am awash with frustration, futility, apathy/complacence, dismay, and if I am honest enough to admit it-- despair and discouragement. Cognitively I get that I "feel" stuck and that things just aren't improving or really going to improve, and that attitude is one of the biggest obstacles to progress. (I once saw someone wearing a shirt that said, "The man who thinks he can't and the man who thinks he can, both are right..." I don't remember the rest of it, but that part was profound enough to stick with me.) One of the biggest obstacles I think I face personally is feeling largely disorganized. So I need to find a way to start doing that. Yet I feel frustrated also because I feel like sometimes my family just doesn't get it. I can't do this without them, and it doesn't exactly feel like they are helping or even trying to work with me (more in terms of household organization than personal weight management, but I think if I felt things were better there I could focus on improving my diet/ exercise habits).
Weigh-in: 147.0 lb lost so far: 25.0 lb still to go: 7.0 lb Diet followed poorly
   (1 comment) on diet Calorie Count   gaining 2.0 lb a week

23 September 2014

The last few weeks have been rough mood wise. Though the difficult times have also provided me further evidence and assurance that I am blessed with great friends and family. It's definitely hard to not get stuck in "Suck City" (the kind of mental tar pit where the primary thing one is aware of is the feeling of pain or loss or emptiness/ unfulfilment). A lot of what is pulling me down is stuff I can not control, though as a friend helped remind me today, I need to not get too far ahead and focus on the here and now. All of this is temporary, no matter how it may feel sometimes. Take care all! BTW, for those celebrating the new civil year this week, shana tova! May it be sweet and prosperous! (For those who don't celebrate the holiday, may you find renewed blessing and hope, may you enjoy the bountiful favor of G-d that is regenerated each and every day!)
   add comment on diet Calorie Count  

23 September 2014

Weigh-in: 145.0 lb lost so far: 27.0 lb still to go: 5.0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment on diet Calorie Count   losing 0.7 lb a week

13 September 2014

Weigh-in: 146.0 lb lost so far: 26.0 lb still to go: 6.0 lb Diet followed N/A
   (1 comment) on diet Calorie Count   steady weight

29 August 2014

Weigh-in: 146.0 lb lost so far: 26.0 lb still to go: 6.0 lb Diet followed N/A
   (1 comment) on diet Calorie Count   gaining 1.1 lb a week

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