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07 May 2015

Let the insanity begin! And possibly the drinking.. This may require drinking. Today at lunchtime I bought superman, spiderman, AND minion undies! Not for me.. for little man. Since everyone but his little brother at the new daycare is potty trained we (the sitter and I) decided it was probably past time to start. Plus he has another little boy the exact same age as him at this daycare so we're hoping that being one of the guys will help motivate this. Personally I'm kind of jealous of the minion undies. I want minion undies. Motivation of the day!!! Lose enough weight to wear minion undies... if I take two pair and sew them together they could fit some day. Although then the minions will be twice as wide... Anyways..

Diet advice of the day.. if you're confident and you love yourself you can do whatever you put your mind to. So this got me thinking.. when I was most successful I bought new clothes, did my hair, didn't wonder what the sticky substance was on my foot, and.. I thought I kicked butt. I need to get that back. Also this weekend in addition to chasing the little man while he pees through the house is accepting me. Getting some sun. Painting my toe nails. Heck I might go wild and shave my legs if I can get into the shower alone. Maybe with a little pampering and a little self acceptance and a little less negative head talk I will get my mojo back. If not.. well then I will be able to wear capris and flip flops again.

And now.. I nap. Soccer practice is kicking my butt. We get home at 8. Hubby and I eat dinner while the kids unwind. I clean up around the house and then I go into a coma. Hopefully the boys get into the new groove soon so I can be one of those lazy parents that sits in their lawn chair... head thrown back.. gut sticking out.. butt squishing out the side.. Nevermind I will chase the boys in my capris with shaved legs and cute toe nails and drink more coffee the next day.

06 May 2015

I ran out of coffee creamer this morning so I am going on a sugar/caffeine fast.. I expect it to last until around 1:15. By that point I will either buy a cup of coffee or drool in a corner. Heck maybe I will drool in the corner with the cup of coffee. I realized last night after picking up little ceasars because I just didn't want to cook, eating all the breadsticks accidently and not remembering it during the ride home so I blamed it on the nose picker next to me and then hid the bag because it was evidence, and then being so tired I was crying as I fed calves that I have not had a full nights sleep in 2 years and 11 months. Little man did a freak thing once when he was 3 months old where he slept through the night but I was too freaked out making sure he was breathing to sleep. My one and apparently only chance.. and I missed it! And no.. you can't tell me to tell their father to take the night shift because it doesn't work. Blood curdling.. I WANT MAMA! from the next room is going to wake me up anyways. The husband would do it but the children will disagree.... loudly.. and then demand a cookie because daddy is a sucker. Anyways..

I'm tired, slightly brain dead, and soccer season just started. The preteen wants to play soccer. I encouraged her several times that she could quit since they only had the meeting to discuss the program but she still seems convinced she wants to play. Tonight is another practice. The only good part is it forces me to go outside with the boys and play on the schools swingset. Oh and go into tubes to get children who claim to be lost while carrying peanut who seems to gain a pound for every 10 minutes he's held. Tonight.. I'm coming prepared. I'm bringing a stoller and snacks and wearing a shirt that can't be easily pulled off. Maybe this will be my new fitness routing. Heaven knows the monkey bars could kick my butt. Added bonus? Tramatizing the preteen when her friends see me attempting the monkey bars. OMG MOOOOOOM MOOOOOM GET DOWN!!

In other news I got a jury duty summons for next week so I may be MIA. I'm excited though. Is it bad when the thought of sleeping in a half hour later in the morning makes you absolutely giddy about jury duty? Now watch I will get all excited and they won't need me so I will have to go to work.. which sucks. I hate work.

06 May 2015

Weigh-in: 183.7 lb lost so far: 7.3 lb still to go: 58.7 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment on diet DairyFarmersWife's own diet   losing 0.2 lb a week

04 May 2015

I had a strange idea over lunch today... I've been attempting to write a little each day and failing miserably. I'm constantly second guessing myself. Sometimes 5 or 6 times so it's getting past second guessing and going straight to paranoia. Like right now I'm second guessing this entry because I'm afraid someone is rolling their eyes and thinking "here we go again" or "seriously? Another would be writer?" Coulda shoulda woulda.

Anyways... They said write what you know. I know fiber farts. I know struggling with the smell of KFC in the car and the slim chances that the buscuits will actually make it home and playing with the idea of just telling the family "oh they must have forgotten them..." This... and butt cramps from doing too many squats or failure to be able to walk up or down stairs after a good workout. So this is what I write about. That being said. I went back and forth while shopping for my lunches for the week between the story and my journal entry. It could be the complete lack of sleep for 2+ years now but I got a light bulb moment. Combine the two. I can write journal entries. It's something I do for myself and some people want to actually read them. So what about writing a story that uses them? What about creating the main character on here with her very own personality and page and bad habits. Heck she could be my ulter ego that succeeds without pizza binges. She can binge on something else. These could be used as chapter intros or summaries. This is what happens to her and this is how she perceives it...

Is this an insane idea?

29 April 2015

Forkit! Yes I said forkit! I have come to the conclusion that I have two goals this year. The first is to get down to 130 lbs. That gives me 53.9 lbs to lose in 244 days. Yes I counted them. No seriously I counted them. No not the lbs the days. I looked at the calendar and I counted them. Granted I accidently closed outlook in the middle of counting and I got distracted in the middle by a phone call so I could be wrong. But I attempted to count the days. Now that I think about it a better plan would have been to count the days already gone this year but I counted the days until December 31st.

I'm going to reach this goal by working my butt off and not slipping up with splurge days where I shove everything imaginable into my pie hole. It doesn't even have to be something I really want, sometimes I just shove food in just because I know I shouldn't and sometimes I don't like not being able to do something. I swear my butt is another personality that takes over from time to time in an attempt to widen it's space.

So from now on when that little voice tells me to go get a second slice or to take the big piece of cake I'm telling that little voice to go Fork itself. Because.. I can't curse. It's all outlined in the challenge I'm in. No cursing and no nose picking. Today that little voice keeps telling me to go get a candy bar. I think it was upset that the scale kept it's recent dip for 2 days in a row. Hopefully tomorrow it shows another drop so I can really piss off that inner fat chick.

I'm a strong, capable, determined chicky. I will reach 130 lbs. I'm not wasting another day to get their either. I keep hearing the phrase "You never know how much time you have." So starting today I'm taking advantage of every day I've got. I'm losing the weight. I'm going to feel better about myself and get healthy and I'm writing a freaking book.

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