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09 August 2016

Have you ever looked at your spouse and thought "I wonder if he's ready for a divorce yet." That happened tonight. And then Ben and Jerry completed their journey to cheer me up. Ben and Jerry have officially left the building. The husband and I.. eh.. we're not really on speaking terms. He's stressed over the farm and the drop in dairy prices and bills. I'm just plain stressed. Two stressed out people plus 3 screaming kids just adds to more screaming. Especially when one of the kids smashes another kids hand in the door on purpose because he doesn't want him to go to the outside. Then one parent yells at the child and drags them screaming to time out while the other parent (points to the husband) demands to know. "WHAT NOW??" Yup.. did not go over well.. for anyone. Then one parent (points to the husband) walks dramatically to the barn. Uh huh.. then Ben and Jerry appeared and the thought popped into my head.

It is remarkably quiet in the house now. I passed on the meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I figure Ben or Jerry were more than enough let alone both of them. Then I cleaned the house like a mad woman... and now the husband is walking back and forth sighing... I think a kid got mashed potatoes on him.

Starting right now all of this has got to get better or I'm going to start learning to knit so I can make us all straight jackets. On the plus side a knitted straight jacket would be fuzzy and soft and I wouldn't be able to put any more Ben and Jerry's in my pie hole.

Tomorrow will be a better day. Both for my diet, my nerves, and hopefully my marriage.

09 August 2016

06 August 2016

I have a pain in my butt. I think it's a muscle but I'm not positive. I'm going to believe it's a muscle because it makes me feel better about my butt.

So far so good this weekend. Eating is good. Not excellent but still goodish. Exercise is up there. I have a secret.. you get your kid a child size john deere gater that cannot support your weight. Then you say "Come on kids lets go check the cows!" Then they drive down the kill going over the posted 3 mph and head into the hay field that borders the pasture field.. while you yell.. Wait!! Wait!! SLOOOOOOW DOWN!!! YOUR DEAD MEAT!!!! As they go.. past the cows.. and head towards the swamp. We have a stream in the back of the property that is all overgrown so the husband calls it the swamp. The kids looove the swamp. So do the dogs. Who currently reek of swamp water. So as I jog.. yes I jogged. I never jog. I'm convinced something will jiggle in some way and I will injure myself.

I finally catch them and literally pick the 4 yrs old off the gater and place him firmly several feet from the gator where.. he promptly pees his pants. Not because he finds me that scary.. because apparently the mad dash to the swamp was also a mad dash to the tree line because he had to pee. Peeing in the middle of a hay field is a huge no no. At least it apparently is today. Mind you this kid would pee facing the highway so I'm not exactly sure what's bad about a hay field that is over a mile from the road. Well now he can't ride because his pants are wet. He can't drive naked either because then gasp he would be naked on the gater. Another no no I just learned about.

In my genius mind I decided the 2 yr old wears a diaper the 4 yr old can have his pants and he can run around in his diaper. Genius right???? Wrong. The 2 yr old who I can barely keep clothing on now needs all of his clothing. Thank god for cell phones, a preteen who is constantly on hers, and her sudden willingness to run into a hay field with shorts. Oh but wait!! The field has feathers in it from all the pigeons that appear out of who knows where. *smacking head* Exercise? Check. And now I go off to milk cows where I will get more exercise.

That scale better freaking move when I finally weigh in.

05 August 2016

I want to make up with my scale. I know I know I said we were separating for a month but then my pants were feeling loose and now they are feeling tight because I'm a female with reproductive capabilities and I'm hormonal and I want to know how much I weigh!! Apparently if you're addicted to the scale and you give it up for a month the addiction becomes very very obvious. Stupid scale.

Eating has included a few minor blips mostly because we have zero food at the house. Fried haddock at lunch was the result of nothing to pack for lunch and refusing to go the fast food route. I did pass up Mac n cheese so I am still showing I've got this. I haven't gone on any major screw it throwing in the towel and eating whatever I want episodes. I'm even logging the good, the bad and the ugly. I'm on a 10 day streak and that's the longest streak I have had in a long time. I'm pretty sure this is because I gave up the scale and started reducing bad carbs. Who knows.. I could actually lose a lb or two when I weigh in on the 25th. 20 days to go... Just sayin.

This weekend is going to be insane. My to do list at work and home are so long right now I almost feel paralyzed. Going to make manageable lists when I'm done creating the longest ever type-a-thon on my phone because fatsecret is still a porn site. At least... My journal on it is. I never knew I was so steamy!! So onward and forward and over the hill I go.

03 August 2016

Work has decided that fatsecret is a porn site and blocked it. Do you think it was my boob moon comment that sent IT over the edge? Today was a good day. Thanks to Robert making me completely paranoid I have taken 26 pictures of the back of my neck since I can't see what it looks like. Interesting factoid. If you work in an office with a giant glass wall looking out into cube land and you take repeated pictures of the back of your neck people stop making eye contact. I would wonder what they thought but I'm practicing being shameless thanks to a book by Brene Brown. Only.. my loan from the library ends tonight and I'm only 1/3 of the way through the book so I'm probably doing this completely wrong. If I am don't tell me. Being shameless is entirely too much fun. I'm taking this advice as permission to lose most of my filter in real life. Imagine this journal.. only in person by a person who takes pictures of the back of their neck because they are paranoid of a spider bite that may or may not be killing them and may or may not have eggys.

On the bright side we got a new cow and calf called Red and Red Spot. The boys are in love with the calf. Exercise tonight was helping 4 and 2 yr old boys taking a calf on a walk up and down the barn floor. I'm not entirely sure the calf enjoyed it a lot but the boys did and keeping the calf out of the milk cows got me moving.

There is now a kid climbing my leg so I have to wrap this up. Today was good. Lesson of the day be shameless and if you live in upstate ny DO NOT get the book from the library. I need to renew my audio book... Good stuff though. If you live in another state go for it and get it. Also if you want a lesson in patience, don't mind having your toes crushed, and feel like jumping behind cows with their tails up because the kids are squealing "THE COW IS PEEING ON HER!!" Go take a calf for a walk up and down a barn floor in the middle of milking. On a side note. My husband deserves an award for being patient with all of us because when you take a calf into a barn full of milk cows every girl has to get a look at the cute lil baby. :)

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