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18 April 2016

Apparently you should never become upset when a kid at a 4-H bake sale outside the tractor supply store yells to you "HEY LADY YOU WANT A COOKIE!??!" Bad bad things happen. I think it's a karma thing. I didn't say it but I instantly thought. "Do I look like I need a freakin cookie?" But I smiled and said no thank you then walked by. The kid gave me a dirty look on my way out. So I told my daughter who waiting in the car about the snot nosed brat who tried to break my great eating strike with a cookie.. which was right next to the dog treats that looked identical to the cookie. Just sayin...

All in all I'm doing great. I'm busy. I'm eating what I should. I avoided ice cream with the family twice and treated myself to fruit instead. Then karma happened. I was doing something dumb. I will not now nor ever admit to my husband what I was doing. It's bad enough I was wearing flip flops while I ran in the barn to feed cows quick. Blah blah blah yada yada.. I have no big toenail. At least I think that's the extent of the damage. It hurts like crap to walk on also but I think that could be to the lack of toe nail. Does it hurt to walk when you do that? No clue. Never lost one until now. I also realized I only own pointy shoes so I'm wearing flip flops. I never realized until now how hard it is to keep a flip flop on when gripping the little thingy next to the big toe hurts so you don't... also going barefoot is apparently inappropriate in the work place. Pfft. Anyways.. I was averaging 10,000 steps or more according to my fitbit toy. Today? It's 1:00 pm. I'm up to 1,341 steps. I just went from kinda sedentary while at work to a lump. I'm a lump. Can you lose weight while being a lump? When will my toe stop hurting? When can I wear cute pointy shoes again!?!?! I wonder if I can wheel my office chair to the bathroom...

13 April 2016

13 April 2016

Weigh-in: 203.8 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 78.8 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment on diet DairyFarmersWife's own diet   gaining 0.8 lb a week

07 April 2016

Train with your kids they said. Make your kids part of your workout they said.. Are they nuts? My bargain for the preteen doesn't appear to be working. She tried to haggle with me for more money per minute then didn't follow through with watching the little monsters. So I decided I would workout with them and see what happened. Concussions happen. That's what happens. First there was the planks. That really wasn't too bad. Peanut decided he could crawl under me.. and lay there. I guess it was motivation to stay in the plank longer than I thought I was physically able to do. It was great.. until he spotted my cell phone with the timer and ran into the next room with it. Next were crunches.. he was distracted by the cell phone so that should have worked right? Eh.. no. He was too distracted by the grunts and came in to slap me in the head every time I lifted up. On and then he giggled which brought in his brother and then they both sat on me. I'm not sure if it was the abuse or the workout but I feel stomach muscles today. Which.. I immediately assumed were hunger pains and ate some chips. I figured out they were abs when they didn't go away after eating the chips. It's amazing what I can talk my brain into believing.

Still 2 days with planks and crunches and squats is more than nothing. At least my stomach says it is and that's all that counts.

06 April 2016

My name is Elizabeth and I have front butt. It's official. I looked in the mirror this morning and I have the one thing I've feared since I spotted it on my mom and sister. I have front butt. I don't like front butt. I have every intention of losing my front butt. I'm trying to look at this positively and see it as motivation to relocate my front butt and reduce the zip code of my butt butt. Lets face it. I have a butt obsession. Starting today I am going to come up with a list of exercises and stick to it. If I start small and pay the preteen to babysit for 15 minutes I could actually accomplish this. So that's the plan. Find daily motivation in front butts and actually workout in some way.

A few weeks ago I surrendered and bought a fitbit hr because well.. I wanted to confirm that I could eat more than 1200 calories. Because well.. 1200 calories just seems like torture. Cruel cruel torture. So long as I have a 500-700 calorie deficit I should show some progress on the butt plan. So workout... relocate the butt.. and eat less than I burn. So far this plan is coming along nicely. I think.. Note to self.. buy a new full size mirror for the bedroom so I don't lose sight of the front butt.

In other exciting news. I have an extremely round pregnant barn cat living in my house. She looks like a basketball. It kind of makes me wonder if they are stuck but when I mentioned making her an appointment everyone looked at me like I was nuts. Something about nature taking it's course or some crap. All I know is I have a round basketball barn cat living upstairs and I don't want her to explode. Luckily she does use a litter box and she likes the house so well we can hear her purring upstairs all the way downstairs. The dogs are slightly confused but they look at cats as toys so what they don't know won't hurt them. It does seem to give them gas though. My eyes are watering right now as I type. gasp...

Does any of this make sense anymore? I lost track between my eyes stinging and watching little man take all the knobs off my dresser. I'm waiting to see what he does next. Plus his brother is napping and he is quiet as he dismantles my dresser.

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