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21 March 2014

I made it to the gym 4 days in a row this week. Today? I slacked. After being up super late because I was sick last night, waking up at 4 am, and feeling just.. blah. I decided today would be my day to relax. Technically I could still workout at home but I'm not sure if the tiny humans at home will let me. Little man tends to look at the elliptical as an amusement ride. Then again.. he looks at everything as an amusement ride. Last night jumping off his toy truck was an amusement ride. Heck.. maybe I'll just repeat everything he does tonight. Within an hour I will have burned more calories than I ever could have at the gym. New workout trend! Follow the toddler! Attempt at your own risk. May need a doctors approval before performing.. stock lots of ice packs.

I've been reminded thanks to the baby that I need to watch what I eat. Apparently a bag of pepperoni bites is on the "Rejected" list. I ate it.. the baby rejected it. So this weekend I'm going to be more mindful about what I eat. A bag of carrot sticks might have been more welcomed. Here's to mindful eating and listening to our bodies... even if they have someone else currently controlling them. lol

Can't wait until monday to start the Love Yourself Challenge. I hope it can be as inspiring to others as it is to me. I also hope we can inspire each other along the way. :)

20 March 2014

"You've always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself" - Glinda, The Wizard of Oz

I love this quote. These days I have so many people telling me what I can or cannot do that it's infuriating. For the most part I smile and try to say something with a little humor but it always sails right over their heads. My favorite is.. "Why are you still working out???" Um.. because I can. I'm pregnant not disabled. Responding with "Honey this is the third one. I'm in training. If I get out of shape before this one arrives they will eat me alive." usually only leaves them insisting I quit immediately. *eye roll*

Second favorite... "Don't lift that!!!" Why? If I can lift something and I'm not straining... I'm going to lift it. Before Pregnancy I was lifting 100 pounds. Daily.. Multiple times a day. I've cut that down to 50-75 lbs. Feed bags are 50 and hay bales go between 50-75. At this point I'm just smiling and saying.. oh?? Can you get this for me?? Then I watch them struggle with something I would have thrown over my shoulder and walked away with. *eye roll*

You can only lift 10 lbs. 10 lbs??? What in the world weighs 10 lbs? Little man is 30 lbs and I still throw him in the air to watch him giggle. Best tantrum distraction ever. Kid throws himself down.. oh no!!! you fell!! Throw him in the air. He completely forgets he wanted to destroy sissys homework. Granted when he does this in public the old lady at the grocery store looks at me like I'm a potential child abuser but really? Throwing a toddler into the air is a cheap amusement ride for the little man. Plus.. I'm not that mom who can calmly stand there and say.. no no honey.. don't do that. Pfft.. She's lucky I didn't throw him over my shoulder and threaten him with duct tape.

I've learned I have power. I have power I haven't even found yet but I know its out there. It can be strength, it can be patience, it can be dealing with bills, a leaking roof, and appliances that quit suddenly. I have power. I have the power to not stick my tongue out at all the people trying to take it away. I'm going to go load up a taco salad with jalapenos now. I dare someone in the cafe to say something. First though.. I'm going to go workout and get my smutty book fix on the elliptical. You know.. that thing I'm probably not suppose to touch.

19 March 2014

I've successfully worked out 3 days in a row despite trying to talk myself out of it repeatedly. Today I tried to reason with myself and say it was a rest day just because it was Wednesday. Why is Wednesday a rest day? I have no idea. It seemed like a good excuse though. Tomorrows excuse? I'm not sure but I'm probably going to come up with something. Hopefully my desire to read smut wins. I've decided since I have to workout moderately I might as well get my smut fix. Only problem is when I get to the smutty parts I'm afraid someone is reading over my shoulder and I skip past the good sections! Why? I don't know. Probably the same reason Wednesday is a good skip day.

I'm finally getting caught up on a backlog at work. My handy dandy to do list is helping me get caught up at home. By this weekend I might actually be able to put my feet up and take it easy for an hour. I better stop messing around online so I finish things up before I blow my chances of sitting on the deck in 35 degree weather enjoying sping. Oh no.. that wasn't sarcasm. 35 degrees is a heat wave.

19 March 2014

Weigh-in: 193.5 lb lost so far: 0 lb still to go: 0 lb Diet followed reasonably well
   add comment on diet DairyFarmersWife's own diet   gaining 1.0 lb a week

18 March 2014

Something happened to me yesterday that I would have journaled about last night but to be honest it took me all day long to really work through what was going on and how I felt about it. Before I go on my long endless rant I need to thank FullaBella for motivating me to start the Love Yourself challenge. Without all the reading and idea searching for the challenge I'm not sure if I could have made it through yesterday without burying myself in easter candy and corned beef.

I take my little man to a daycare that my sister-in-law also uses. She is actually really good friends with the woman and was the one that recommended her to me. Well.. the other day when I posted the picture of my baby bump on here I also copied it over to facebook. I found out yesterday, thanks to the sitter, that the sister-in-law can't believe I was letting myself get so fat. My first reaction? Go home, hide under the sheets of my bed, cry my eyes out, and never come out. I didn't do this though.

My second reaction.. Why would anyone be happy someone else is gaining weight? Why would me getting bigger be such a hot topic? Now I know these women... I know the sister-in-law has some sort of silent competition with me that I don't buy into. It can be comparing the kids, our homes, our lives.. she has to see where she is better. She's also a woman who has always struggled with her weight and who I've always been smaller than especially after I lost the weight with little man and she didn't from her little girl. And the sitter? She likes to gossip and will agree to anything someone says to lend a gossip ear too. She's also always trying to get me to go on these crazy diets where you eat under 1,000 calories a day. Both of these women are tickled pink that I'm getting big. Granted I'm pregnant but I was the smaller one and now I'm going to be the huge one. Me getting big and them getting happy about it is just a reflection of their own insecurities. I don't have to make their comments my issue.

Then with the help of hubby I reminded myself of something. Sister-in-law will always be someone who is less than pleasant. His word for her was a little more harsh. BUT.. I'm more than either of these women will ever realize. I'm stronger, I'm more capable, and I may be bigger but I'm healthy, I eat right, I exercise and I won't always be this way. That and then he picked me up and twirled me around so I felt smaller. :)

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