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11 August 2016

Dear Self,

Stop being an A-hole and get with the program. Zebra cakes have zero nutritional value and no.. they are not a "morning pick me up". We will not "start over tomorrow". We will not put off exercise because we are "busy" with the kids, cows, sleep, housework, or freaking out over what we ate today. Again.. zebra cakes have no nutritional value don't even think about looking at the box to justify them.

We were in shape once. We will get there again. Yes we are a shape now and that shape is round but that's not what I was talking about and you know it. Stop being a butthead. We treated our body well once. There was a time when a zebra cake was looked at with the disgust that it deserves. Yes it deserves it. Stop looking at me like that. No we should not eat them all to get it over with. The children have been raised to sniff these things out and either eat them or take a bite and promptly throw them to the ground where they expect the dog to eat them. Zebra cakes are dog food.

Stress is not an excuse to eat. Life is tough and you're no cupcake. We need to lose the muffin top so that statement is more believable.

In conclusion, Self get your crap together.

Thank you,
Your butt, muffin top, front butt, ankles, and the buff chick living inside you that is getting ready to kick your butt if you eat another zebra cake

09 August 2016

Have you ever looked at your spouse and thought "I wonder if he's ready for a divorce yet." That happened tonight. And then Ben and Jerry completed their journey to cheer me up. Ben and Jerry have officially left the building. The husband and I.. eh.. we're not really on speaking terms. He's stressed over the farm and the drop in dairy prices and bills. I'm just plain stressed. Two stressed out people plus 3 screaming kids just adds to more screaming. Especially when one of the kids smashes another kids hand in the door on purpose because he doesn't want him to go to the outside. Then one parent yells at the child and drags them screaming to time out while the other parent (points to the husband) demands to know. "WHAT NOW??" Yup.. did not go over well.. for anyone. Then one parent (points to the husband) walks dramatically to the barn. Uh huh.. then Ben and Jerry appeared and the thought popped into my head.

It is remarkably quiet in the house now. I passed on the meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I figure Ben or Jerry were more than enough let alone both of them. Then I cleaned the house like a mad woman... and now the husband is walking back and forth sighing... I think a kid got mashed potatoes on him.

Starting right now all of this has got to get better or I'm going to start learning to knit so I can make us all straight jackets. On the plus side a knitted straight jacket would be fuzzy and soft and I wouldn't be able to put any more Ben and Jerry's in my pie hole.

Tomorrow will be a better day. Both for my diet, my nerves, and hopefully my marriage.

09 August 2016

06 August 2016

I have a pain in my butt. I think it's a muscle but I'm not positive. I'm going to believe it's a muscle because it makes me feel better about my butt.

So far so good this weekend. Eating is good. Not excellent but still goodish. Exercise is up there. I have a secret.. you get your kid a child size john deere gater that cannot support your weight. Then you say "Come on kids lets go check the cows!" Then they drive down the kill going over the posted 3 mph and head into the hay field that borders the pasture field.. while you yell.. Wait!! Wait!! SLOOOOOOW DOWN!!! YOUR DEAD MEAT!!!! As they go.. past the cows.. and head towards the swamp. We have a stream in the back of the property that is all overgrown so the husband calls it the swamp. The kids looove the swamp. So do the dogs. Who currently reek of swamp water. So as I jog.. yes I jogged. I never jog. I'm convinced something will jiggle in some way and I will injure myself.

I finally catch them and literally pick the 4 yrs old off the gater and place him firmly several feet from the gator where.. he promptly pees his pants. Not because he finds me that scary.. because apparently the mad dash to the swamp was also a mad dash to the tree line because he had to pee. Peeing in the middle of a hay field is a huge no no. At least it apparently is today. Mind you this kid would pee facing the highway so I'm not exactly sure what's bad about a hay field that is over a mile from the road. Well now he can't ride because his pants are wet. He can't drive naked either because then gasp he would be naked on the gater. Another no no I just learned about.

In my genius mind I decided the 2 yr old wears a diaper the 4 yr old can have his pants and he can run around in his diaper. Genius right???? Wrong. The 2 yr old who I can barely keep clothing on now needs all of his clothing. Thank god for cell phones, a preteen who is constantly on hers, and her sudden willingness to run into a hay field with shorts. Oh but wait!! The field has feathers in it from all the pigeons that appear out of who knows where. *smacking head* Exercise? Check. And now I go off to milk cows where I will get more exercise.

That scale better freaking move when I finally weigh in.

05 August 2016

I want to make up with my scale. I know I know I said we were separating for a month but then my pants were feeling loose and now they are feeling tight because I'm a female with reproductive capabilities and I'm hormonal and I want to know how much I weigh!! Apparently if you're addicted to the scale and you give it up for a month the addiction becomes very very obvious. Stupid scale.

Eating has included a few minor blips mostly because we have zero food at the house. Fried haddock at lunch was the result of nothing to pack for lunch and refusing to go the fast food route. I did pass up Mac n cheese so I am still showing I've got this. I haven't gone on any major screw it throwing in the towel and eating whatever I want episodes. I'm even logging the good, the bad and the ugly. I'm on a 10 day streak and that's the longest streak I have had in a long time. I'm pretty sure this is because I gave up the scale and started reducing bad carbs. Who knows.. I could actually lose a lb or two when I weigh in on the 25th. 20 days to go... Just sayin.

This weekend is going to be insane. My to do list at work and home are so long right now I almost feel paralyzed. Going to make manageable lists when I'm done creating the longest ever type-a-thon on my phone because fatsecret is still a porn site. At least... My journal on it is. I never knew I was so steamy!! So onward and forward and over the hill I go.

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