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17 November 2014



I'm soooo sleepy. This may have something to do with staying up to watch the Walking Dead then deciding to meditate before going to bed. Know what happens when you try to meditate after watching the walking dead before going to bed? You meditate about zombies then fall asleep and dream about meditating.

Today is going well. I packed my lunch. Ate it by 10 am. Packed a snack which I ate at noon since my lunch was missing and now its almost 3 and I ate pretzel m&ms which were only 150 calories so I'm considering this a successful hiccup. It wasn't the gigantic 350 calorie candy bar I was eyeballing. It was the lesser of the evils. Tomorrow I will pack more snacks. Or possibly ask a co-worker to lock up my lunch bag and not give it to me till 12.. or 11. Or whenever I whine alot.

I'm managing to get alot of writing done. Well maybe not so much the writing but the planning and the ideas. I've got tons of those. I started writing today at lunchtime. Since I had no lunch I had some extra time. I have a serious question though.. If you were reading a book where the main character accidently got rained on with cow poop. Would you continue to read? If the main characters love interest laughed when the main character got rained on with cow poop would you no longer want them to end up together? I had to come up with something after the fiber farts. I came up with raining cow poo.

14 November 2014



Today has been a fun day. I didn't manage any workouts last night. For the last week I've had moments of light headedness. (Yes I'm an airhead.) They would last for a second or two then disappear so annoying yes but I figured it was just lack of sleep or maybe I was coming down with something. The only thing is these moments keep getting longer and longer to the point last night that I made a doctors appointment today. Something just isn't right. I don't know what it is. I just know it isn't right. So I figured feeling like a balloon head without aides like nyquil is a bad thing and I took the night off.

At the doctors they didn't really have a solution. They just took blood, told me to drink lots of water, cut down on the caffeine, and they will call me back monday with the results. So.. I think this means I'm going to be watching what I eat and drink and maybe I should take it easy? It's not like I'm dizzy and the room is spinning though. I just feel I don't know.. disconnected. They did say if all the tests come back negative it could be anxiety. So.. working out and keeping up with it would be a good thing! But if its something else working out could be a bad thing. Or I could have lyme disease which I'm not sure if working out is good or bad. Or I'm just an airhead literally.. an airhead. Or it could be something went wrong when I had squirt because I'm on the pill and I started my period 2 weeks earlier than I was supposed to. Maybe I'm allergic to the pill and I'm supposed to have more kids. Yup that's probably it.

13 November 2014



I feel glorious today! I worked out. I did it. I had some sort of strange vortex moment where all the kids went to bed and I was still awake! I was awake.. and I was grazing in the kitchen.. and I yelled at myself for grazing in the kitchen then I put on my running shoes and I got my butt on the elliptical for 30 whole minutes. It felt amazing. I didn't even care that it was 10:45 by the time I got to bed or that I would have to get up at 5:15 to get ready for work on time. I worked out! I did it. Sure this sounds pitiful to most but you know what? As little man would say Blaaaaaah. I did it. hehehe

So bed news.. I binged. Good news I stopped binging and got on an elliptical so I think that makes me even steven. I'm going to try to workout again tonight because it felt like heaven. Sweat dripping down my butt crack?? Heaven. Dying of thirst and cursing myself out for not grabbing a water bottle? HEAVEN. Only hiccup is the elliptical has a sqeak. I think a bearing is starting to dry out due to lack of use. Bonus.. I have a husband with access to a grease gun and stinky PB blaster. If I have to I will drag the thing out of the bedroom and doctor it. I'm planning on working out every day if I can because well.. it felt like heaven. Better than a hot tub and a glass of wine. Better than 5 minute sex before a kid comes knocking on the door wanting to know what we're doing. Better than a hot shower with a kid on the outside attaching the shower curtain to your butt because he thinks hearing you make ew gross noises is the funniest thing on the entire planet.

I could be dillusional. I don't care. Today is a new day. I'm going to eat like a champion. Workout. And um.. well.. I don't know what else. I don't really have a life at this point. Which is exactly why I should become an obsessive fitness chick so I can pick up a quarter with my butt cheeks. Is that even possible?? I don't think so.. it could be. I'll find out for you and let you know.

On a completely different note. I think I'm going to open my own blog. Someplace that I can talk about cows, cow pies, flinging haybales, and hubbies butt. I just have to figure out where.. I'm thinking wordpress but some woman stole dairyfarmerswife in 2008, wrote one single freaking blog, then disappeared. I hate her. I don't know her.. but I hate her. So any suggestions? Wordpress good? Bad? Don't quit my day job? Take up knitting instead so I'll have a fuzzy straight jacket?

12 November 2014



The preteen can still move. She managed 100 situps and 50 crunches.. then she said this is hard and quit. lol I think I might find some 30 day ab challenges and print them out. If we turn it into a competition where she is trying to beat me at something then she might be more willing to watch the boys for 10 or 15 minutes while I workout in the next room. I'm pretty sure she would do anything just to say haha I won! That's if she wins.. She wants to sign up for basketball this year so I can use the whole you need to be in shape to kick butt reasoning with her.

I stepped on the scale this morning and I didn't like what I saw. I'm convinced it's from 2 days of salty popcorn so I'm refusing to accept I went back up from 190. I just refuse. I like my little dillusional world. If the weight is still there next week then I will record it. But for now I'm in denial. I'm in denial about alot of things. Like the cobwebs in my living room or the fact that it looks like the laundry room exploded. I'm getting good at this whole denial thing.

Eating is going pretty good. I'm still limiting sugar but not much else and my desire to eat everything in sight seems to be winding down. I still need to eat better but I also have to make it to a store. That's just not something that happens during the week. I live too far out in the middle of nowhere and I have cobwebs to battle. Oh and socks. I need to find socks that match and put them away. I swear I have an entire freaking basket of just socks. Seeing as I just put them away last weekend this amazes me. Do socks reproduce? This could explain why none of them match. Maybe socks don't have twins.

Yesterday I managed 75 squats but nothing else. Just random squats in my office in between people walking by. I wonder how I could throw in some other exercises... Do you think I could do a pushup and claim I was looking for my pen under my desk if someone walked by? I'm just not sure how I would justify the swearing or grunting. You can't exercise without proper breathing you know. Breath in... curse out. I'm going to go do random squats some more. Maybe I should do pushups off the copier and pretend I'm trying to beat it into working again.

11 November 2014

Second journal of the day because well I had to share this with someone.

Let me start off by saying preteen is smart. Straight A's on the principals list, high honor roll, etc. She does have these moments of specialness though. Today she called me at 9am and asked if there was anything she needed to do while she was home. I gave her a couple small things like put the clothes in the dryer. She then got all excited because this means she has time to workout. I confirmed it.. she said workout. So I told her ok but she needed to change the batteries in the display of the elliptical. Oh no.. she's not using the elliptical. She wants abs. Her plan is to do 1000 situps. Yes she said 1000 situps. I asked her to repeat the number. I even said "You mean 100 situps?" Nope.. its 1000 situps. She wants abs. Apparently if she does 1000 situps today she will have abs. Granted she's as skinny as a beanpole. It shouldn't take long to see abs. They wouldn't be buried under tons of fat like mine but she's expecting them by oh say 8pm tonight.

Being the supportive parent that I am. I recommended she do some other excercises too. Like 1000 planks and crunches and maybe hanging upside down off her bed and doing situps that way. I wonder if she will be able to roll out of bed tomorrow. Or situp at all. I will keep you posted.

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