Almaviva87's Journal

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24 January 2013

My first week didn't go so well for any number of reasons, but I still managed to lose one pound, and I'm feeling a little more optimistic. I've decided to try leaving dairy and flour out of my diet for one week, just to see how I feel. I've also bought, for the first time, agave syrup and coconut oil. I'll be using the oil on some sweet potatoes tonight.

Weigh-in: 150.0 lb

lost so far: 1.0 lb

still to go: 30.0 lb

Diet followed reasonably well

(1 comment) losing 1.0 lb a week

17 January 2013

Hello there.

I join this online community at a moment of intense frustration. Five years ago I was at my heaviest, tipping the scale at close to 170, but, gradually, I lost about 40 pounds of excess weight. I felt good. I felt pretty. Then, chiefly through stress eating and social eating, I regained twenty of the pounds I had lost.

When I was really overweight I never noticed feeling physically bad, but now, having been within spitting distance of my health and fitness goals, I constantly feel bad. It's been nearly two years since I regained the weight I lost, and I haven't been able to sustain any significant weight loss in all that time. I keep telling myself that I lost the weight before and I can do it again, but I'm getting discouraged. Why can't I lose the weight anymore? I don't understand it.

I started the New Year with good intentions, but I think I was trying to be too restrictive with my calories, especially considering that I'm exercising more intensely now than I used to. About five days into my diet I was starving and exhausted. I couldn't think about anything but food, and finally I wound up binge-eating. Today I planned on getting back on track, but the food I was preparing took longer to cook than I expected, and by the time it was ready I was so hungry that I binge-ate again. I am really tired of this cycle. It doesn't help that it's January; this is a hard time of year because I'm a pescetarian, and there just isn't a lot of produce out there in winter. I mention this not as an excuse but as an explanation of my frustration. I keep pushing my weight loss goals further and further into the future-- I'll get there by the end of summer, I'll get there by Halloween, I'll get there by Christmas-- but I never do get there. I want to be perky and optimistic, but it's hard to be so when you're getting back on the wagon for the 16th time.

I don't always feel comfortable talking to friends and family about my weight woes because it's embarrassing and, I'm afraid, boring. I'm hoping that being here will help me stay on track and give me an outlet for celebrating my triumphs and regrouping after my failures. My brother is getting married in June, so I have an extra incentive for staying on track until then (and beyond). To that end, these are my goals:

- Beneath 1700 calories a day (the goal recommended by this site. In the past I've tried to stay beneath 1300, but maybe that's why I'm starving.)
- 50 minute Zumba class 3-5 times per week (I currently average 4)
- walk 30 minutes minimum per day

Here goes nothing. Once more to the breach, good friends, once more!

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17 January 2013

Weigh-in: 151.0 lb

lost so far: 0 lb

still to go: 31.0 lb

Diet followed N/A

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