Group Forum: stop judging me.

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Joined: Jun 10
Posts: 6

Posted: 25 Jun 2010, 11:51
I recently started a new job in an office, and there are plenty of days with ordering in lunches and bagel breakfasts, etc.. so I try to make sure I at least have a healthy breakfast so Im not tempted by all of these things. The bad part is, Im the young one and because im "conscious" of what I eat and want to maintain a healthy weight, the women here tend to be a little judgemental. I.E. if we go out for lunch, I order a salad ( which most of anything when ordering at a restaraunt is huge) so I limit myself with howmuch I eat of it. Its not that I want to go hungry, I just want to make smart decisions and not sit at my desk all day feeling bloated, over stuffed, guilty, and discouraged.

How can I continue to make smart choices without getting discouraged by feeling judged and ridiculed by the people I spend every day with??Question

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 162

Posted: 28 Jun 2010, 10:06
honestly, I would keep on making those choice. After a while, it will rub off on them. I eat really healthy at my job too. Eventually some of the ladies began to eat healthy too.

- Elizabeth
"Living a healthy lifestyle will only deprive you of poor health, lethargy, and fat." -Jill Johnson

Joined: May 10
Posts: 19

Posted: 30 Jun 2010, 07:40
I can totally relate! People bring in donuts and junk food to share at my office ALL THE TIME (which is why I put on several pounds over the winter). Now that I'm watching what I eat, I avoid that stuff but someone is bound to notice and say something along the lines of "you're skinny, you don't need to worry about eating that stuff".

Well, you GET thin and STAY thin by not eating that crap!

I say just keep doing what you're doing, people are probably just envious of your fitness and control and wish they could be the same way. Like enu said above, you might even get some other to hop on the healthy-eating bandwagon, too.

Joined: Jul 10
Posts: 1

Posted: 29 Jul 2010, 20:50
Yes! They just want you to eat what they are eating so they can feel less guilty about eating crap themselves!

Joined: Jul 10
Posts: 25

Posted: 02 Aug 2010, 09:50
Theyre just jealous!

Joined: Aug 09
Posts: 1

Posted: 11 Aug 2010, 15:04
I have some similar issues. My family pokes at my hip bones and tell me to eat more cake. Then they tell me my diet is never going to work. I guess they don't realize that its a life style, my choice to eat well. Ever since I changed my eating habits I've had more energy and look better. And then I find myself wondering why others don't try it...

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 3

Posted: 25 Aug 2010, 18:21
really, some of my girlfriends get annoyed at my conciousness but i think it is that they just don't want to feel guilty about eating crap. but my mom is the worst she is constantly telling me i need to "get fat"... no thank you!

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 2

Posted: 28 Aug 2010, 08:34
Misery loves company Julietwfg, don't let anyone bring you down. You are doing something fantastic for yourself. Continue on your path, for your life. As long as you are happy, then everyone else either needs to be happy for you or they need to get out of your life!!

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 3

Posted: 23 Sep 2010, 15:27
They do the same thing to me at my office. Always bringing in donuts and pasteries and shoving them in my face even though they know I don't want them. They roll their eyes at me because I watch my weight, and they tell me how I don't need to worry about it.Duh! I'm thin because I don't eat that crap!

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 9

Posted: 28 Sep 2010, 13:34
Ahh, I can SO relate to this post. This has actually been an issue for me for the last 3 years. My boss and her assistant eat anything and everything. They'll often comment on what I order or what I decide to eat. My boss even said to me once: "You are so provincial" bc I stick to mostly non meat and often order the same few things at restaurants like salads and veggie burgers. It used to really really bother and upset me. I often felt like "Why do you CARE what I am eating!?!" Would you ever comment on someone at work eating something unhealthy, like "Whoah buddy, do you REALLY need that bagel and cream cheese?" No, you would not. So it's completely innappropriate for people to do the opposite.
That being said, I now let it roll off my back. If I've learned anything from my experience, it's that people want other people to take part in eating poorly so that they don't feel as bad about themselves while doing it. It's more glaring and obvious if someone else resists eating crap. But at the end of the day, it's YOUR body, not theirs.
I sometimes will respond with: "You know, I try to eat healthily and stay away from (donuts, bagels, burgers, whatever) even though at times I'd like it, it simply doesn't work for me in the long run". And what's the worst that happens? So they make comments, who cares? It's better than someone commenting on your fat butt while walking down the street, right!!?

Joined: Jul 10
Posts: 3

Posted: 06 Nov 2010, 09:39
Haha I can relate.

Today I was shadowing at a doctor's office (ironically a weight loss clinic) and a representative (who also said he needed to lose weight) shows up with Baskin Robbins ice cream/ frappucinos. Under the peer pressure my strategy was to drink very slowly and to only drink half, then throw the rest away. Exercise your power of restraint! Think of it as a way towards self discipline.

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 3

Posted: 29 Nov 2010, 07:25
I started telling everyone I'm allergic to yeast! now when they offer me pasteries I remind them I can't. It's not really a lie because I am allergic to it but not severely haha

Joined: Dec 10
Posts: 8

Posted: 15 Dec 2010, 07:58
I don't have an issue like this at work... but what I do find is when we have ppl over to our house they always bring dessert, and they tend to be very caloric ones. I would rather eat fruit or not have dessert at all, but then they bring 4 pastries because we are 4 ppl and I feel bad not eating eat. I'm not sure how to bring it up in a way to not offend them.

Joined: Dec 09
Posts: 2

Posted: 12 Jan 2011, 15:13
It's not a work issue for me either, but in general, it's hard to convey to people that I'm trying to be healthy - even to other people who I know are also trying to lose weight! I'm petite (translate: short!), so it feels weird or insensitive communicating to people that I'd rather be a size 4 than a size 8. Because of my height, a size 8 looks wider on me than it does on others. And it's also what I need to do to reach a healthy weight for my height. I'm not trying to be stick skinny; I just want to be proportional! I really am on those last 5 pounds that I'm trying to drop, but it's been almost a year and I can't seem to get rid of them.

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 42

Posted: 07 Mar 2011, 15:58
I get this double time because not only do I eat healthy, but I am a vegan. It seems EVERYONE has to make a comment about my eating habits when they should be watching their own! But as previous posters have said, misery loves company. I remember when I had a gym membership in the dead of winter in Ohio and I HATED making the drive there.. I always felt better if my husband would skip with me rather than go after work eventhough I knew it was wrong. You need to surround yourself with those who support your decisions, like people here, and shrug off those who don't. Let them make their own poor choices and you will see who looks better in the end. Smile

Joined: Sep 11
Posts: 2

Posted: 04 Oct 2011, 04:00
The people at work are lovely and bake delicious cakes and sweets all the time. I find it hard to say no without offending them and they do taste so good, but they are ruining all my good intentions.

Joined: Sep 11
Posts: 1

Posted: 18 Oct 2011, 09:18
People are always wanting to suggest I have a an eating disorder because I'm always trying to count calories. and want to lose 8 more pounds. I agree with what someone said earlier, I feel better working out and watching what I eat. I have more energy and I'm starting to feel better about what I see in the mirror (I'm trying to lose the last few pounds of baby weight). My problem is I keeping yoyoing. I have terrible will power when it comes to sweets. Something I def need to work harder on.

Joined: Sep 11
Posts: 3

Posted: 13 Nov 2011, 08:26
I find this so frustrating as well. I either have a protein shake for my breakfast or lunch, or I try to have something healthy and count the calories with my phone app. I am quite open about the fact that I watch what I eat and that I would like to lose a few lbs! One (larger) girl in my office keeps suggesting that I have "issues" and that I would be more attractive if I put on some weight. I find this really unhelpful and I wish she would just stop caring what I eat and maybe think more about what she is eating!

Joined: Sep 11
Posts: 2

Posted: 28 Nov 2011, 10:53
Agreed. I feel like every time i bring a salad to work that's the day the office wants to order pizza, or someone brings in a box of donuts. Not dunkin donuts, the real big ones from like a REAL bakery haha.
And i can also relate to the comments. When i try to pass it up or say im trying to eat healthy and other say but your skinny you can have it! I always want to say "and i want to stay that way".

Joined: Dec 11
Posts: 20

Posted: 22 Dec 2011, 21:09
I gained 20 lbs from eating goodies at work and not having time to exercise(I felt like I didnt have time but I do!). At work, I flat out tell people that I cant eat the treats because it makes me pack on the weight and I need to get back to my normal. Most people are understanding and to the people that say I look fine, I tell them that is only because I am wearing scrubs (comparable to the hiding power of pjs). I have lost 9 pounds so far...