CurlyLocks66's Journal, 16 April 2012

I think it was a couple of weeks ago that I wrote a big journal entry about getting back on track. However, some reason, I just didn't get back on that track like I wanted too.

So this Sunday, I headed out to the grocery store and I said it is time to get on track. I bought a bunch of healthy groceries. All the things I know that work and I was loving to eat before I stopped cooking again and started living back in my fast fix, fast, food, fast processed, fast way to heart attack lifestyle.

Today is a fresh start, no more beating myself up for my mistakes. Time to take control back! I had a wonderful breakfast this morning and it tasted good. I packed my lunch last night, filled up my water bottles and I am ready to have a successful day.

I have learned a lot on this journey and in the last few weeks, I realized that I am my own biggest enemey when it comes to using food to fix my problems. Sometimes when I watch The Biggest Loser, I can really relate to the contestants on the show. Especially when this season, Chris forgot about herself, binged and felt so bad. I really hope she makes it when she gets back home.

If I don't learn to put myself first, if I don't learn to make myself a priority, I will never overcome my weight. Why do we let our own happiness suffer? I was getting so happy, feeling so great, and for the last month it has been a roller coaster ride. I am so hard on myself, but yet so easy on others. Why do I judge myself so much, why do I set such high standards for myself, and why am I so mean to myself when I don't reach those goals.

I am learning day by day, this time I'm not giving up, I'm not gaining it all back... I am giving myself a break instead.. I am gaining strength, inner knowledge and the will to know I can do this.

Some people I know, never think about food. They never make it such a central point of their lives. I do not know if I will ever get there, but I do know that I need to find a way to get to a better understanding of my relationship with food.

Heres to making things happen for 'ME'!!

Eat to Live!

209.8 lb Lost so far: 23.2 lb.    Still to go: 44.8 lb.    Diet followed poorly.

Diet Calendar Entry for 16 April 2012:
2315 kcal Fat: 113.79g | Prot: 81.43g | Carb: 258.65g.   Breakfast: Coffee, Splenda Mocha, Special K 5 Grain, Almond Breeze Unsweetened Vanilla, Water. Lunch: Kirkland Marinara, Silhouette, Strawberries, Turkey Muffins/Loaves. Dinner: McChicken Sandwich, McDonalds Fries Medium, Diet Coke. Snacks/Other: Kellogg's All-Bran Bar Orange Cranberry, Chocolate Cheesecake, Butter Toffee Almonds. more...
on diet CurlyLocks66's own diet   gaining 2.0 lb a week

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WTG, CurlyLocks. Nothing says a new start like healthy groceries. I don't know what some people do, but for most of us on this site, food is at the center of our day. It has to be; that's the only way to have control. You CAN DO this.  
16 Apr 12 by member: Helewis
Thanks to my biggest cheer leader!! You always find me in my time of need. You're an inspiration! :) 
16 Apr 12 by member: CurlyLocks66
:) Thanks 
16 Apr 12 by member: Helewis
Hang in there, girl! One day and one meal at a time. I've been struggling this past month as well- I got spoiled mid-March around my birthday and have been giving in, little by little, since. Nothing is worse than the guilt I feel after going out and having a meal that I have no clue how terribly I just ate. Remember the best feeling in the world in confidence! We can get there! Eat to live! 
22 Apr 12 by member: flagchic

     
 

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