oishiiuwu's Journal, 27 September 2011

what is your biggest fear? losing him, or not losing him? enough fish in the pond, but just ONE true love, are you making your true love wait? 

I don't want to lose him, but he was horrible to me. He lied to me for months. He's making me wait, I begged him back and he said no and now he wants to get back together on Friday. :/ 

You're settling because in the back of your mind you believe he's all you'll ever have. His excuses are crap sweetie and the sooner you realize it the better of you'll be. Love doesn't wait... especially not for an essay. if you sell yourself short now, you'll always regret it. Maybe not right away, but you will. I speak from experience. I was emotionally abused for years by a man I thought LOVED me and used that LOVE as his excuse... I left him 3 months before we were supposed to get married - his so-called "love" just wasn't worth all of the heartache I had to endure. I really do hope that you can find the strength to stand your ground and be the woman you're supposed to be and not the one he dictates. 

If someone truly loves you, they don't lie to you for months and they wouldn't make you wait till their paper was done. Maybe you should take a break to find out if it's really what you want. Life is short. 

Hi buddy, all good comments, my thoughts are if you have the time on Friday and the courage to stand up for what you want then manage that meeting when it happens. In the meantime don't wait feeling uncertainty rather rotate the new guy in and only give full rights to the ex-BF when he can turn your head again with joy not fear. YOU CAN DO IT! 

Thanks for the comments, guys. He just wants until Friday to think, he says he feels so guilty about everything he did that he knows he doesn't deserve me and he's afraid he'll end up treating me like that again. The new guy is really moody and it causes me a lot of stress. I'll think on things until Friday and then I'll give an update on what happens.