Deb_N's Journal, 26 September 2014

Well look at how great you are doing! Great job! 

Excellent weight loss! I love to read your journals. I want to thank you for all of your inspiration and support. 

I can relate to your story. My mom still thinks she needs to lose weight even though he Dr specifically wrote on her report YOU DO NOT NEED TO LOSE WEIGHT!!!! I believe she where is an enormous size 12 now. When I was about 12 or 13 she gave me exercises to do specifically for my butt because she said it was getting too fat. I wore a size 8 and she has a flat white girl but I take after my dad who is part Hispanic. It's the shape of my body get over it! I still think she started most of my weight problems.  

How you judge yurself is not always what other people see and sometimes you dont see what everyone else sees... i, as a father, would never belittle my child over anything--theres enuf hate and spite in this world---ur parents should be pillars of support u can always cling to..i am sorry that ur mom inflicted her views on u.. Now u can shape ur persona. 

Awesome weight loss Deb, & I hope no one has been giving you any grief for anything you've posted on here. If they have, just let me know & I'll punch them in their "virtual nose", LOL! This is still a free country, & we can post anything we want. I always enjoy your posts, & am very encouraged by them. (((HUGZ))), GLAMMER 

Family members can sure do a job on you. Glad you are being set free from all that nonsense. :)  

Deb, I can't begin to tell you how much I empathize with your post. You are doing great! My mom and sisters had small frames, so I was a standout, not in a good way. I remember I weighed 140 in 7th grade. I and all the girls there thought that was HUGE. I asked my mom several times if there was a mix up at the hospital where I was born. Most of the schools I attended had "Twiggy" sized girls. "Shaming" Does Not Help someone to lose weight. Usually makes the person want to hide from others and get comfort, many times from food. Please don't hold back on your postings. They are yours! It helps everyone when someone "speaks their mind", helps to know we are not alone. 

No need to frown upon the negative past , celebrate your current success and achievements. Think about it this way that computer nerd that everyone picked on is now Bill Gates- Who is laughing now 

You are doing the right thing, "letting it out..." 

Your post really hits home for me, Deb. I grew up in the shadow of an older sister who was 5'11" and a naturally thin 125 lbs with the body of a supermodel. Both of my parents were tall and slim and I was 5'7", 140 lbs and labeled the "short, fat one of the family.", even though I am not really short or fat by most people's standards. Puberty was a rough time for me, and my developing curvy body was a source of shame, self loathing and humiliation. Fortunately, these feelings never escalated to the point of a full fledged eating disorder, but it did send me head first into 25 years of diets and constant disapproval with my body. We all seem to carry around so many negative feelings about ourselves. I, for one, am determined to reclaim my confidence and exude self-love and acceptance, regardless of my size. We are all beautiful "works in progress", after all.  

I love you all. Thanks for the support and comments! 

Deb, i love reading your posts, and am glad you are going to continue posting. I have come to look forward to seeing your posts, and am always inspired and filled with admiration by what you write. I'm so sorry that you were made to feel less "perfect" than you were. You have more than shown your mother (and us) that you have what it takes to do anything you set your mind to! I am so proud of the accomplishments you've made, and i have no doubt that you have the determination to continue to stay at your desired weight. You are amazing, and i am so glad that i met you on Far Secret! Hugs to you! Keep up the great work. 

Good Job Deb!!! 

One thing I've promised myself as a mom is I will never let my kids know how I feel about my weight. :)  

Parents, people of authority don't realize the influence, the shaping and the moulding power they have over their children's personality and lives. That's why we must be careful of what we say and how we act. The children pick up the tab.  

I think we all come away with many feelings from our parents. I know my children do as well. Growing up I had to fit the kid of a corporate big shot image that my parents had. That included needed skills that I rebelled from like playing bridge and golf. My dad used to make me practice being able to talk for at least 3 minutes on any given current affairs topic. It was required when I was a teen to read the wall street journal everyday. I definitely today do not fit that world, it was not one I chose to live in even though I'd be financially better off now. I had no desire to be the perfect corporate wife like my mom was.  

Feel sorry for your mom. 

I know the feelings. I was Rosalind Russel at a time when Twiggy was "in" and I always thought I was fat. Of course now I am but I'm working on it. I just meant to be that 160 pound girl with big bones (thanks SO much for that grandpa). I looked GOOD in those pictures and I'm going to again. We can do it! 

I love Rosalind Russell!  

I read an article some time ago. It was about life insurance and their ideal weight was 10-15 under what one should be. I understand where your coming from.