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I'm starting to slowly understand "exercise".
i used to hate any kind of movement, well it only takes 20 days to create a habit they say... well my habit is to work-out everyday. When i don't work-out i feel all weird and restless, so i put on my headset and dance around the house (try out the drum-solo from phil collins on youtube) Now it took me 3 months, but i really enjoy going to the gym, i love spinning (did i just say that?)
When i am cold, and hungry, tired or angry, i cycle to the gym thinking, when i am done i will no longer feel that way... And it works.
By the way did you guys ever lift weights while you are angry? If you really want to know how strong you are, it is very motivational.
I started writing, no wait hear me out... nothing autobiographic or anything, just a story about a man who becomes king of a very aggressive nation. This is all about balance, when i dance and sing in the day, i cry and struggle in the evening. But this time instead of eating my feelings away, i write my feelings down in my book. For example when i am sad, my charakter is sad, when i am angry my charakter is angry. It really helps me get in though with feelings i have had my whole life but never dared to confront. (Took me 42 years, slow learner i guess)
The book is in dutch so none of you will read it (*lol*)
Anyway what else is new, i never told you guys this before, but beginning of january my sister almost took her own life. To keep this light reading i will not (yet) go into detail but long story short i finally received an email from her, so a little contact with her is restored. I don't think we will ever see eye to eye though. She always makes me feel guilty about everything, and i am so tired of her blaming the world for all her problems and mistakes.
Maybe later y'all.
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