smartygirlCA's Journal, 25 June 2016

Wow, now that is a tough question. Sounds like this is a decision for your husband. I would listen to the doctors. 

WOW Lots of prayers. I agree with Warren, follow the Doctors advice.  

thanks guys, the thing is- its in Mexico so we only semi-trust because of issues from the past... its hard to get a second opinion there. I figured there was an abundance of knowledge from FS members. Again thanks Warren and Sheleenc! 

Wow Smarty that is rough, if she can't get co2 to the brain, massive brain damage MAY have already occurred, but there is a chance it might repair itself. Is there brain activity? This is a tough decision for any family. If there is brain activity then I would opt for life support, if no activity then I would call it no hope and extending someone's suffering to opt for life support, I'm no expert of course there may be many factors that would increase her chances for survival over an extended life support session. It may be hard to get a second opinion in Mexico, but you can always call your own doctor and have a discussion about it. There are also many organizations you can speak to who can give you information Hospice is one of those. Best of luck to you ya'll are in my prayers. 

i've neen a nurse for the better part of 50yrs , most in critical care. honestly the situation sounds irreversable, if one believes in GOD then one has to believe there is a better place place to go. and it is honestly kind of selfish of us to hold on and and not allow our loved ones to go there when it's their time.  

by the way ; the brain need o2(oxygen) not co2(carbon dioxide) {02 in, co2 out} 

Thank you for the correction Kathleen, I was being lazy and did not want to try to spell oxygen in the dark on my keyboard I c02 sounded right at the time :) 

My heart hurts for you to have to make these kind of decisions. You must follow your head AND heart, whatever is decided will be RIGHT for HER. People, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE let your wishes be known about what kind of care you want! Put it in writing what measures you want taken. It takes so much of the pain, worry, and decision making away from your loved ones! 

I work on an ICU step-down where we get chronic ventilator-life support patients; it is extremely hard on their bodies and it is very painful; I used to tell my family I wanted everything done, but not now. If there is not enough O2 getting to the brain and in a vegetative state the prognosis is not good. It will mean a life of being maintained with medication, tube feedings, tracheotomy tube and ventilator to breathe; being placed in a long term care facility to be cared for or have home nurses or stay in the hospital, constant infections, and 90% of them get extensive bed sores that require surgery, wound vacuums and colostomy-poop bags to keep the bottom clean. I hope this can help you.  

I'm so sorry that this is happening in your family. Give her teenage son lots of support. Blessings on you all. 

You and your fam are in my thoughts. 

A terribly sad and most difficult situation. If the son is not too upset to be involved in discussions about what to do, it might be best if he heard from the doctors what the chances of recovery are. Perhaps he or others are aware of what the woman's wishes would be in this event? It is perhaps important to remember that death is natural and life support for someone who cannot recover is unnatural. That, of course, does not ease the pain much.  

Wow, after reading the above description of end of life, I going to make an appointment with my nearest bar and bartender. 

I apologize about the last comment, but I'm an old guy! 

Oh man. In my prayers. Look after yourself. It's easy to not eat and not drink anything from stress. Hang in. 

Thank you everybody for your support and ideas, honestly I don't have my own doctor here to ask (just go to Gynocological clinics once in awhile). DEBRAFREDERICK, you are right, she has brain activity. She speaks a little, waves at us on FaceTime, she's not 100% I'd say closer to 30% of what she used to be. So she doesn't get enough oxygen so they have her on Oxygen. The doctors are saying her body is not converting that oxygen to enough C02 levels. So they want to induce a coma, put her on anesthesia, then see if that will stabilize her to create the C02. Right now, most of the family members don't want to induce a coma because they think she might not wake up from it. We understand her quality of life will be one of oxygen tanks everywhere, but that's OK. She was already quite homebound to begin with due to her circulation and legs not working too properly. What would you do in this situation? I really value your opinions. 

A coma will allow her body to rest a stabilize, if it can. Last summer, my husband had a terrible car accident and they put him into a coma to reduce the stress. It was terrifying for all the rest of us, but it allowed the docs to control his vitals while he stabilized, then they brought him out in a controlled way. It worked. He was badly injured but otherwise healthy. I would let the docs give it their best shot; they have experience. If she doesn't come out of it, maybe that's what's meant to be, and she will pass peacefully. Just my 2 bits from afar. 

Thank you Erika, somehow my MIL has improved drastically today! I think she's finding the power from within to come back to us! Now we are thinking about counseling because she needs to change her lifestyle or the hospital will be permanent. 

I send wishes for strength. And may the angels be watching over her. When she pulls through, maybe she will be prepared to fight for her health and accept radical changes to whatever brought her so low. Blessing on you all! 

I hope you are right and she is coming around so she will have that fighting chance. I have seen many people turn back from the brink of death.