flagchic's Journal, 19 June 2015

Well, I've kept pretty quiet on here for the last two or so weeks as I re-jump start my healthy lifestyle.

A year and a half ago, I weighed my lowest since early high school- 192 lbs. I was 25, newly married, healthy, toned, looked and felt great. Even if I wasn't at my end goal of 160 lbs, I felt incredible and confident.

Where did that go? I got complacent, stopped working for it. I let the compliments draw me in and made me feel like my work was done. I think we all know that the work is never really done.

I've had a few kicks in the last year of trying to start again, but made excuses. Too busy, too stressed, too inconvenient. So, two and a half weeks ago, I weighed in at 228. That's a gain of 36 pounds, almost half of what I had originally lost.

It's hard to explain the embarrassment that I feel, as well as the disappointment in myself. I had told myself I would never backtrack, and here I am. It's gone from compliments to the sort-of pity eyes of my friends and family, the "Oh man, she's gained it back" thoughts I'm sure they have. It's upsetting, but I need to let this feeling drive me to get back to not only where I was, but to my original goal.

I lost four pounds at my last weigh in last week, and the next weigh in is tomorrow. I'm not rushing it, and certainly not hoping for a miracle, but please let me see a difference. I need this motivation back.

Diet Calendar Entries for 19 June 2015:
1505 kcal Fat: 39.75g | Prot: 71.97g | Carb: 236.99g.   Breakfast: Kellogg's Special K Fruit & Yogurt Cereal, Silk Pure Almond Milk - Unsweetened Vanilla. Lunch: Tilapia (Fish), Melissa's Baby Red Potatoes. Dinner: Southern Tsunami Sushi Bar Spicy Tuna Roll, Fujisan California Roll Sushi. Snacks/Other: Laughing Cow Mini Babybel Light Cheese, Campbell's Soup on The Go Classic Tomato, Apples, Emerald Natural Almonds 100 Calorie Pack, Chocolate Frozen Yogurts (Soft Serve), Oreo Chocolate Sandwich Cookies. more...
2902 kcal Activities & Exercise: Desk Work - 8 hours, Resting - 8 hours, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
on diet flagchic's own diet  

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Comments 
I am right there with you. It is really easy to get complacent about staying on track. You think, "It's ok I will get right back on." Nope! I have gone through this since my daughter was 7 and she is now 22. I support your effort and can sympathize with your struggle. It is never easy and it never will be. If it is worth it we can and will fight for it, even if it takes numerous attempts. Stay strong and know there is support here. 
19 Jun 15 by member: psyrecep
Hey girl, I am here for you. We were buddies before - and will be again. I gained back some but I say Never.Give.Up 
19 Jun 15 by member: HCB
Your not alone in the gaming back it happens but your back on track and you'll be just fine 4 pounds is a great start. 
19 Jun 15 by member: Addie Aline
You can do it. You're amazing, and you have everything you need to get back to where you were!  
19 Jun 15 by member: vibrantskilvr
I am sorry F.C. Your story, and other people stories (Such as yours) about gaining it all back and feeling so bad over it, keeps me motivated! Thank you for sharing. I will pray that you will lose all that weight and more-again!~Ann 
19 Jun 15 by member: Karriann777
Been there done that! But you are back!!! and that is the first step in getting where you want to be! Kudos for facing the music, taking the time to to take care of your self - YOU CAN DO IT!  
19 Jun 15 by member: krystynecar
Don't feel bad. I sent thousands of dollars having the surgery, lost down to where I wanted to be, had loose skin removal, thousands of dollars and now am 40 pounds back up. Stupid, stupid . . . I want to lose those 40 pounds or all that money, pain and effort was for nothing! You and I are at the same weight I think. So I want to keep up with you to inspire me lol! So girly I will be watching you!!!! lol  
20 Jun 15 by member: qcbuslady
Thank you, everyone, for your overwhelming support! The support and motivation I found on this website community is definitely what helped drive me the first time, and I'm sure it will the second time, as well! 
22 Jun 15 by member: flagchic
I HEAR you! Especially about letting yourself down. But guess what? You're stepping up to the plate and owning it. That's a huge step in taking charge and regaining self-empowerment. You will be able to do it if you keep focus. But you already know all this cuz you have done it before! :) 
22 Jun 15 by member: CindyLouofWho

     
 

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