Eringiffin's Journal, 22 April 2015

My husband asked for a divorce 3 weeks ago and I am trying really hard not to eat myself into a comfortably numb state. It hurts like hell all the time. I can't even drink alcohol for the next 7 days because of a medication I am prescribed. There goes my glass of red wine at night to help me sleep.

I started a belly dancing class to keep me out of the house and focused on something other than feeling sorry for myself. I am going to start kickboxing on Monday. Maybe I can release some of this pent up rage.

I am starting to pack to move out of our house into a smallish townhome not too far away. Packing is good exercise.

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I remember my split. Packing was the absolute worst for me. I could not pull it together. The best thing for me was to stay busy and away from the house for the most part. Secretly in my mind I told myself im going to lose weight and look so good you'll be sorry (I still had pregnancy weight to lose). Regardless if he would have ever felt sorry or not it did motivate me to get fit and on top of that it brought confidence. Not just in myself but to move forward. Keep on with those belly dancing classes girl! You've got this!! 
22 Apr 15 by member: madwaysmom
Eringiffin, Thank you for sharing what you're going through. I understand how hard it is to go through divorce. I also understand how emotional it can be. I had a lot of horrible feelings when I went through it. One minute, I wanted us to work it out and go to therapy, and another minute I would be full of resentment and never want to see his face again. I felt very much in shock, especially finding out the things I did about him. In the end, he wasn't a very good person. He lacked moral standing and the back-bone needed to be a leader, a husband and father. Years have passed, that divorce has proven to be well worth the emotional cost. And you get out of life what you ask for. I must have done something really good in my life, because my now husband is my best friend and hero. It's good not to allow yourself to ruminate. Staying busy doing great things for yourself, as you are bravely doing, is the best thing you can do for your spirit, your health, your body. You need to be proud of yourself. 
22 Apr 15 by member: herpinusa
Hi Erin. Long time no see. Welcome back :). May I ask: Whats the rush? I know a lot of people shake their head at my situation, but it suits me. I split from my husband over 5 years ago. When I asked him for a divorce he pointed out that the 2 years seperation period (you need that in UK unless there is an urgent matter like violance involved) wasn't over. And this was the first time we arqued over money in over in over 24 years. So I thought sod it. He probably realized that it is cheaper for him to stay married to me, I would never get married again anyway. And at the end of the day we are even sort of friends. We do have a daughter which still comes and visits both of us. For her visits I even move back 'home'. What I am trying to say is, don't do anything in a hurry that you might regret later. Take a step back, pamper yourself and do take good care of yourself!!! 
23 Apr 15 by member: schmetterling34
My divorce was final this past December. When he decided to spend our 6year anniversary w/his mistress....ya I know how you feel. I do kickbox, at least 3 days a week, and it is the only reason that he survived the divorce process. My bag was named after him. Kickboxing will do you a world of good, best stress reliever I've ever found. Be strong and kick ass; and you'll get through it.  
23 Apr 15 by member: Rubie-sue
Been through it twice. {{{{{HUGS}}}} because nothing I can say will really help. 
23 Apr 15 by member: Lucy1771
I've never been brave enough to get married, so you are one up on me. When I feel like my life is out of my control, the one thing I have total control of is what I put in my mouth. Stay strong buddy! 
05 May 15 by member: aurora3354
It's been so long since I made this journal and then disappeared. I thought I would die. I did try to end my life. Looking back from where I am now it's kind of hard to believe I made it. I had a lot of help from friends, from God, and I am stronger than I ever thought I was. I know everyone who replied here is long gone, but if you ever come back one day like me, and read this, I wanted to (finally) say thanks for all the kind words of hope and support. <3 
25 Jul 19 by member: Eringiffin

     
 

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