Ms Elizabeth's Journal, 09 April 2015

Yesterday sucked monkey butt. So today's motivation is to not suck monkey butt. Ever have one of those days where you get this feeling when you get up that you should crawl back into bed then the entire day you wish you had done exactly that? That was yesterday. From taking the long way to work because a row of idiots weren't allowing traffic to merge to get on the interstate, to a tenant who seems to only be happy being unhappy and stressing over every little thing, and a boss who suddenly has an issue with everything and everyone... Stick a fork in me. Everyone needed to be heavily medicated or put in timeout. Holy snowballs. Then a co-worker brought me sausage bisquits and gravy.. and food snowballed from there. She even bought me a brownie at lunchtime. Although I failed at food I did get 5 good pushups in 5 sets of 20 squats, a 1 minute plank, barn chores, and 20 minutes on the elliptical.

Today is a new day. Today will not suck monkey butt. I refuse to let it suck monkey butt. I will eat right. Sure I found half an almond joy in my desk from some day when I had actual self restraint. I don't know what day it was. I completely forgot about it because days of self restraint are far and few but it's there and its yelling "EAT ME" but I'm not going to. Sure I'm about to sell my first born for chocolate but I won't. And sure.. the almond joy looks all cute and innocent and really coconut is a natural item.. and almonds. Almonds are good for me. The chocolate layer is thin.. there probably isn't that much chocolate on it. There is more coconut and almond than chocolate so really the benefits of them outway the milk chocolate. I'm sure it doesn't have nearly as much sugar as I think it does. It's probably just as healthy as a salad. If I thought I had self control to pull it out of my desk and read the nutritional data I would probably find out it was a perfectly acceptable diet item. I don't have self control though so I'm leaving it in my desk and letting it taunt me. I'm even trying to trick myself into believing this will make me a stronger person if I can just avoid the candy bar. I'll show that candy bar whose boss!

Update... We have a coworker who is nice and slightly odd. She is sweet though and she tries. Since last week she has started wearing something that smells like a chemical plant/lavender product. It is slowly getting stronger each day. Today she came into my cube and I literally started crying, my throat hurts, I can't breath.. it's horrible. But she's sensitive so I needed to figure out how to politely tell her.. YOU'RE KILLING ME. So I asked her.. "Did you start wearing a new hand lotion or something? Someone here seems to be wearing something new and I think I'm allergic to it." She flat out denied it. But the thing is.. it's obviously her. A cloud is starting to form around her. My head is about to split open because my sinuses can't take it. I'm not positive but I think she's just declared chemical warefare on the rest of us. Everyone can smell it but I'm obviously allergic to whatever it is. She won't stop visiting me!!! She keeps asking how I'm doing. BADLY. I'm doing badly!!! Go AWAY!! But she's sensitive so I can't say that. Instead I chucked the candy bar at her head because it seemed like the most polite way to say leave me alone. Viola! Two problems solved. I hope. At least one is solved. The other might come back to see how I'm doing.