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Had something on my mind to journal about, and Buffy was so sweet to say she missed my journals... so I decided to go ahead and write it today. (this is a second journal for me today...but who cares :)
Far too often we go thru life and become consumed in our own troubles. And why not? Some of them are doozies! But eventually we have to come to terms with ourselves. With our commitments. With our priorities.
This lifestyle change is just that. It is a commitment. One I made to myself - and one so strong, that I will not allow other things in my life to derail it. Sometimes, I feel like I am "committed to my commitment" more than I am to my new way of eating... but it gets me thru the rough patches.
That commitment has held me steady in the face of stress, illness, and heartache. Mainly, because I finally made taking care of ME ... a priority.
That in and of itself was very difficult. I am by nature a giver. But not to me, to other people. So, to give to me the time, and the attention this priority deserved - WOW! That was a GIFT!
And I am so glad NOW, that I did. Even after the last 10 days of unbelieveable stress, sorrow, and pain... I did not once cheat, or even feel the need to turn to food. I turned to honest, and true LOVE. I let myself feel, I gave myself permission to be upset - I accepted that I cannot change any of this - and FOOD was the furthest thing from my mind.
Totally liberating to feel the chains that once bound me, to fall away and restrain me no more!!! I felt successful on this trip. I felt like a happy, well adjusted 47 year old woman whom no one (besides my family there) even really knew. They didn't know I had lost weight. And they didn't care even. They didn't know I used to be a much bigger size, or even what size I am now. They just accepted me, as me. They loved me as my Aunt's neice. They saw the me on the inside... not the me on the outside. They would have like the package no matter what it looked like... And I had the most heartwarming feeling inside to know I did the hard work... and came out the other side successfully ready to keep LIVING!
Sure, I am happier at a smaller size. And glad to have rid the weight. And you know what, you will be too when you get to your goals. But you won't get there unless you value your COMMITMENT! and make it a PRIORITY!
No time like the present to stir up that motivation and enthusiasm that you started with... and make this journey about YOU! About YOU reaching your goals. If you need help, ASK! If you need a cheerleader... I'll do it!!! But no excuses. They will derail you. They get in your head, and it becomes like spinning your wheels. Don't do that to yourself. Full steam ahead folks! We've got some living to do!!!
Much Love.
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