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Well it's been a while since I last bothered with this site to help me count calories. I have since left ASL Interpreting school and instead taken a more holistic path with massage Therapy. I graduated an intensive 6 month program about a month ago and started working at a beautiful spa in my home town. During my classes, a woman came in to give us a 20 minute Belly Dancing class- which was so much fun for all of us, men and women alike. I have since kept telling myself- I'm going to take her class when I graduate. Well now I have graduated and am making a very stress-free living and still I have not signed up for the class... I have, however, contacted the teacher and will be attending starting next month. :)
I realize, however, that a once a week dance class won't make the changes in my weight that I want. In looking back at past posts of mine, I recall the day my doctor told me I'm obese- I wanted to slap the woman. Truly, I have never been overweight. It took a long time for me to accept myself and realize that- boobs contribute to weight. And women aren't meant to be twigs. By nature we are supposed to have rounded hips and healthy breasts, not for sexual attraction but for a healthy pregnancy and the ability to feed our babies. I learned many fascinating things in school regarding the human body and how it is meant to function... and how we torture it with our modern day standards.
So I have been struggling with this beautiful mentality because... well when I look at myself alone, I swear I'm beautiful and if anything all I might want to do is develop more muscle- for the sake of my lousy posture and back pain. But when I look at my boyfriend, who is the weight I should be, and half the width I am... I feel... disproportionate. Over the years, I have come to learn what his "type" is, and although he insists every day that I am perfect, (he's very sweet) I know that I am not within the range of types he has.
And thus I am torn between the reality of life, and my self consciousness- weirdly enough- in comparison to my own boyfriend's body. So I'm back to this site so I can count my calories, as we learned in school that the best way to diet is to calculate the amount of calories you need in order to live your daily life at the weight you are, and then cut back by 500 calories at a time (over the course of several months). And I still struggle between my holistic cravings, and the modern world. Interested in advice, if anyone has any. I'm not sure why or how I managed to do this, I think it was something one of our friends pointed out: Wow, you're smaller than Mary is!
That sort of thing. Then somehow it managed to weasel its little demon into my head and has bothered me ever since.
Diet Calendar Entries for 16 January 2014:
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898 kcal
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Fat: 28.05g | Prot: 40.45g | Carb: 126.93g.
Breakfast: Kashi GOLEAN Crunch! Cereal, Wegmans Vanilla Greek Yogurt. Lunch: Trader Joe's Organic Whole Carrots, Red Sweet Pepper, Marketside Arugula & Spinach Mix. Dinner: Ice Cream Cone, Tomatoes, White Rice (Long-Grain, Cooked), Baby Spinach, Ground Beef (85% Lean / 15% Fat), Bell Peppers. Snacks/Other: Wegmans Lemon Sorbet Bars, Fit & Active Light Caesar Dressing, Savoritz Multigrain & Seed Crackers, Trader Joe's Organic Whole Carrots. more...
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1895 kcal
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Activities & Exercise:
Dance (fast step, aerobic) - 20 minutes, Resting - 15 hours and 40 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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