stoppingthecycle's Journal, 07 May 2013

I feel as though an explanation may need to be made for those of you who know that I normally post everyday, but haven't lately.

I have been "maintaining" my weight for the past 6 or 7 weeks. Not intentionally, I still need to lose another 15-20 lbs. I try to tell myself I am doing okay, so long as I keep maintaining and don't gain any weight back. This is a lifelong change, not a crash diet. But no matter how much I try to convince myself of this, I am feeling rather like a loser. I can control what I eat and what activity I do, so why am I not losing anymore weight? I get frustrated, eat more than I should for a few days, then get right back to good eating again. Thus "maintaining." I switched from walking to running (which I hate doing), it didn't help. I let myself eat healthy fats, rather than restricting them, no help. :(

So, now to top off the loser like feeling, I have been trying to start my own business. A pretty basic plan to fulfill a true need. I started dabbling in January, filed for my business license in February, and here we are in May and I have not yet landed a single client. I lost 2 full time jobs last year. One due to management turnover that cancelled my remote work agreement, but I could have kept my job if I wanted to commute 110 miles each way every day (yeah right). The next was 3 months of working miracles for this guy who on my 90th day declared I was no longer needed. I have never lost a job in my career before last year. I have regularly been rapidly promoted and earned special recognition bonuses. To lose 2 jobs in one year was devastating. I am clearly still struggling to get over that loss. Not yet having any clients does not help.

I need to feel successful. I need a win. My weightloss has been that for me up until I hit this plateau. I am tired of this pity party. I have an amazingly blessed life. A good husband, a son who knocks my socks off with his whit and charisma, 2 sisters that live just a couple blocks away that are my best friends. I have 2 other girlfriends that live far away, but we are always available for eachother. It's not like my life is bad. I just really need to get my career back on track and my weightloss kicked in the ass.

So that's my story. I can't wait to get over this hill and get back to feeling on top of the world. Advice is welcome.

Diet Calendar Entries for 07 May 2013:
1981 kcal Fat: 74.81g | Prot: 67.77g | Carb: 222.68g.   Breakfast: Coffee, Sugar in the Raw Turbinado Sugar, Blue Diamond Almond Breeze Unsweetened Vanilla Milk, Egg, Cooked Kale (from Fresh, Fat Not Added in Cooking), Las Fortunitas Truly Grain Tortillas with Omega-3, Basil, Tomato Paste, Raley's Pugliese Bread, Unsalted Butter Stick. Lunch: Pinot Noir Wine, Strawberries, Earthbound Farm Organic Mixed Baby Greens Salad, Cucumber (Peeled), Tomatoes, Girard's Light Champagne Dressing, DiGiorno Shaved Parmesan Cheese, 2% String Cheese, Baskin-Robbins Cake Cone, Baskin-Robbins Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough Ice Cream. Dinner: Pinot Noir Wine, GFS Cheese Tortellini, Tomatoes, Pesto Sauce, Niche Foods Lemon Cookies. more...
2065 kcal Activities & Exercise: Pilates - 1 hour, Sleeping - 8 hours, Resting - 6 hours and 30 minutes, Driving - 1 hour and 30 minutes, Desk Work - 7 hours. more...


Hang in there! Losing jobs does not mean you aren't good at what you do. That is not usually the reason companies downsize. I wouldn't have driven 110 miles both ways everyday either. Don't worry, clients will come. Start up businesses can take up to 3 years before they make steady income. If it makes you feel any better, the last job I lost was when my own parents fired both my husband and I because my mother doesn't like him. He stood up to her and she does not like that. The business I bought from them was a consolation prize. They were hoping I would fail. I showed them and tripled it in size. I hope they don't bruise their butts kicking themselves. Lol!. As for your diet, sometimes it is good to maintain and allow your body to adjust, thereby guaranteeing the weight will stay off. Just redouble your efforts and go for it, what have you got to lose. Pounds right! Keep up the good work, if it weren't for you I would never have stayed in the progress not perfection group and would still be struggling at my plateau. 
07 May 13 by member: Kathy Vanish
One more thing take a deep breath and smile! Everything will work out in the end. It always does. 
07 May 13 by member: Kathy Vanish
Thanks Kathy. You have been a tremendous support to our little band of thieves! 
07 May 13 by member: stoppingthecycle
I've been maintaining since the beginning of the year and can't seem to get back to losing. I bought a new exercise DVD series to try to get myself more excited about exercise again and I've got a new cookbook to try new, healthy recipes, so I will be shopping for some healthy ingredients over the weekend. I feel your pain with the maintaining and for me I know it's my eating habits that are doing me in. Stress could be a factor in your plateau too. I hope your business starts getting clients soon. It's got to be hard to be the new kid on the block with a new business, but you'll get your name out there and things will get better. Good luck!! 
08 May 13 by member: mars2kids
Maintaining when you want to maintain is awesome. When you want to lose, it sucks! :) Thanks ladies! 
08 May 13 by member: stoppingthecycle


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