kingkeld's Journal, 17 March 2013

Good morning, Fatsecret!

Phew... I am so happy I had an Indulgence Day planned for yesterday.

Wife decided to make home made donuts. Damn her.

I gotta say, sometimes she makes this complicated.

Her cooking and her baking is so damn good.

I love her to death though, and I love her cooking. :)

It's hard to NOT give in though, and when I'm in a weak spot - which happens pretty often these days - it's very tempting to give in. Still, I gotta learn to either NOT give in, or at the very least control my intake.

So, yesterday she made donuts. This was on top of the lunch buffet we always go to on Saturdays. I'm just glad that the dinner and breakfast was very reasonable. This made me NOT mess up. I calculated everything, and I ended up 100 caloris above my RDI for Indulgence Day. Not bad at all.

The weight? Up 800 grams. That's perfectly normal for Indulgence Day too.

Wife wants to make more donuts today. I'm not gonna have any, whether I have room in my RDI or not. THey're way too good, and I KNOW I won't be able to have only one.

I'm glad that I'll be out of the house most of the day - I'm gonna rock with Burnin' Live. We're gonna be short one guitar player, so our new singer is gonna play guitar. He doesn't - of course, as he has only been with us for one rehearsal - know any of the songs on guitar, but we're just gonna jam and see where it takes us. It's gonna be fun.

...

I'm gonna go super low calorie today. Even if I was within my alotted and allowed calories yesterday, I feel like I really pigged out. I'd like to apologize to my body by not eating a bunch of junk today. Today, I've had a slice of ham, and a slice of rye bread. That's it. Next meal will be dinner, some 8-9 hours away. I can do this, especially if I occupy my mind, and drink tons of water.

I have also been to the gym already. It's 9 AM, and I am done with working out for the day. Shoulder still hurts a bit, but it's not too bad. It's getting better, and the post-workout pain today seems somewhat equal to the pre-workout pain of yesterday. Slowly getting better. :)

It's been a rough week when it comes to workouts. These last days, I'll reach 7 workout days in a 9 day period. I have NEVER tought I'd do that. It's getting to be a solid habit, and I really like that. I WANT it to be a habit. I want to be able to do this, and I want to feel bad when I do NOT do it. That's gotta be the way to go.

...

It still annoys me that the scale says 90+ kilos. I know. Muscle. Lower fat percents. All that. However, it STILL bugs me.

I'm super proud of the accomplishments. I am super proud when I see a more muscular and much healthier body in the mirror. However, I do also know that I feel better when I am lighter than I am now. I move more swiftly. I am lighter on my toes. And I want that feeling back.

I feel that I have been slacking on my diet this last week. It's been great to see the workout accomplishments. It's been awesome to feel stronger. But I really want to feel LIGHTER. I hope this makes sense. They're two different sides of the same thing, but the lighter feeling is something I really like, it was an awesome feeling when I lost the weight last spring. I really want it back.

So, this week I want to commit to doing better. It's all about doing right. It's all about attitude towards the weight loss journey and the whole process. It's all about making the better choices.

I have my appointment with the surgeons coming up. Obviously, I will be nowhere near the 80 kilos I had promised them. However, I will be a lot lower in fat, and that should count for something, though I don't think it counts enough. I'll just have to wait and see.

Maybe a week or two can nudge me a handful of kilos down if I do good? I've done that before. Maybe it's good enough that I can do it again if I REALLY put my mind to it?

I did put my mind to it a couple of weeks ago, and I ended up at 87.7 kilos one day. Considering that I have consumed less calories than I have burned ever since then, I should be able to at least nudge myself to that level, right? :)

Alright, let's do this!

Today, I'm thankful for:
- LOVING the workout I'm doing. Maybe not so much in the moment (it's hard work, after all), but the feeling afterwards is awesome.
- Rockin' out today.
- Post-workout coffee!

Life is good!
201.5 lb Lost so far: 140.2 lb.    Still to go: 14.1 lb.    Diet followed 100%.
gaining 12.3 lb a week

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Comments 
first of i am so glad i do the cooking.i would kill my husband if he made homemade donuts.that fried dough smell alone would put on 5 lbs.second,i know exactly what you mean about wanting that LIGHTER feeling back.i am searching for it too. 
17 Mar 13 by member: rockytu
LOL, yeah that fried dough is frickin' DANGEROUS!  
17 Mar 13 by member: kingkeld
Homer Simpson drooling 'dooonuts ' comes to mind. I had one in Oct - didn't finish it but if it'd been a fresh hot cinnamon roll with glaze I think it woulda been lights out on my resolve that day. 
17 Mar 13 by member: FullaBella
Bella, I like your "I had one in October". That kinda set things in perspective for me. :) I USED to be like that, but sadly I see that I am no longer. That's a good kick on the shin for me - and one that I'll let inspire me to be a little stricter on the sugars again. THank you, sincerely! :) 
17 Mar 13 by member: kingkeld

     
 

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