RiverRes's Journal, 18 February 2013

This President's day leaves me pensive and extremely grateful. After my son's 3 day stint in the hospital, I have a lot to be grateful for.

I am grateful that my youngest son is relatively pain free. We spoke last night about how his brain seemed underworked. So much of his thought and focus had been tied up with the 40 day headache, that to have it gone leaves him with all sorts of mind leftover to think of other things. It is hard for me to imagine since my role as a parent constantly has my mind going in a million different directions. I often feel like the dog on "Up" that is easily distracted by squirrels.

I am grateful for my daughter. She stood right alongside me helping, talking, and caring for her brother during the dark hours when his body was contorting. She was scared as hell and yet she still did it. I know that she cares deeply for her brother and will fight anyone or anything if they should have the misfortune of picking on him or hurting him.

I am grateful for my older son. When he found out his little brother was in the hospital, he left work and drove 80 miles to see him. He wanted his brother to know that he is there for him. When his desperate mother called during his beloved slam dunk contest and asked him to come get his sister and take her home, he jumped in the car and drove another 80 miles to come get her and take her home.

I am grateful for my brother and sister. They stepped up and did everything I typically do for my parents every weekend. They were very supportive of me when I needed it most.

I am grateful for Fat Secret and my buddies here. They reach across cyberspace with encouraging words and help me realize that I am important,too.

Along those lines, I am grateful for my plan. This is my second stint with close relatives in the hospital while I had my eating plan in place. Two years ago, I would have used the past few days as a reason to eat terribly unhealthy foods and lots of them. Living off vending machines telling myself that doritos are not that bad. Since I have had the plan in place, it gives me a reason to say no thank you to the vending machines or a greasy hamburger, shake and fries from the hospital cafeteria. It often amazes me what they serve in hospital cafeterias.

I am so grateful to be home. It truly is my castle. Here, I have everything I love and I miss it when I am not here. I never realized how much of a homebody I really am. Being home gives me peace and strength.

Now that my son is better, I need to find a way to step outside of myself a little more and increase my circle of support. It takes a desperate Saturday night in the hospital to make you realize that you don't have a telephone number of anyone in your neighborhood that could let your dogs out to go potty.

It is the little things.

Diet Calendar Entries for 18 February 2013:
1318 kcal Fat: 20.41g | Prot: 82.52g | Carb: 202.43g.   Breakfast: Milk (Nonfat), YOPLAIT VERY CHERRY YOGURT, 100% Liquid Egg Whites, country style hash browns, stevia, Flavors French Vanilla Ground Coffee, sargento 2% mexican cheese. Lunch: ROMA TOMATO, SWEET RED PEPPER, baby carrots, ROMAINE LETTUCE. Dinner: lettuce, tomato, rosarita zesty salsa refried beans, Green Chile Sauce with Chicken, kraft fat free cheese, TOSTADA SHELLS. Snacks/Other: Gardettos. more...
2770 kcal Activities & Exercise: Resting - 4 hours and 30 minutes, Housework - 1 hour, Sleeping - 7 hours and 30 minutes, Driving - 1 hour, Desk Work - 10 hours. more...
on diet Ornish Diet  


Paula, I absolutely love your journal today. Well, I always enjoy reading your journal but today, more than ever, you touched me. Bless you for being able to sort through all of the challenges and find the gratitude. Good for you in remembering that you don't have to sacrifice your own health just because someone you love is having health issues. I think that's what happened to me a lot - I felt guilty and used food to punish. Or just poor choices. But not you - you are doing great and are an inspiration. Bella 
18 Feb 13 by member: FullaBella


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