Kasper2010's Journal, 19 July 2010

My eye opener. Last night I thought it would be nice to take some naughty pictures for my husband. He says he loves my body even though I hate it and I know I am a big girl.... but I was fooling myself. I am not just a big girl, I am a BIG girl! I honestly never in a million years thought I was as large as I am. I have always seen myself as being smaller than I am and boy i saw myself WAY! smaller.
I ended up sending the picture to my husbands email (after a few touch-ups) and made the comment: How do you not vomit when we have sex? He was not supposed to answer this but he chose to anyway.
"I dont vomit bcs i love you, but I agree you need to become lets say, a little healthier, but I love you the way you are."
Needless to say I got a little upset. I really need to change things starting yesterday. It is time for me to get more serious about my weight loss and stop making excuses!

Diet Calendar Entries for 19 July 2010:
995 kcal Fat: 21.59g | Prot: 53.99g | Carb: 152.68g.   Breakfast: navel orange. Lunch: Sweet Potato Fries, Spicy Black Bean Burger, string cheese. Dinner: fish, tortilla shell, lime juice. Snacks/Other: special k, skim milk. more...
3318 kcal Activities & Exercise: Housework - 1 hour, Sitting - 4 hours, Pilates - 20 minutes, Resting - 10 hours and 40 minutes, Sleeping - 8 hours. more...
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I also only send the pics after a few touch ups and tons of different poses and camera angles like I'm able to hide my true body from my bf...lol It is an eye opener especially when my someone else takes them and you are caught off guard. I would have been upset too if he would have answered that way even if he didn't mean for it to be upsetting. My bf is pretty well trained to not reply to those types of questions unless it's "because I think you're sexy" lol Good luck on getting serious. There's no time better than now :)  
19 Jul 10 by member: britt-a-knee
I just wanna say, when I saw this pop up on the front page, I winced for you because I understand - been there, with a well-meaning but confidence spearing boyfriend. Don't let it get to you - you are motivated now, so turn that feeling into fuel to help you resist temptations on your way. =) Also, I understand that feeling of needing to start yesterday. I feel the same way a lot of times. Thoughts like..."if Ihad started this last year..." are hard to pop when they pop up. Good luck!! =) /cheer 
19 Jul 10 by member: Noraneko
There's no time like the present to make a change! Pictures in general are a real eye opener for people. But sometimes it's just the fuel we need. You can do this & we're here for you! So then your husband can eat his words & say more useful things to you = ) 
19 Jul 10 by member: Evil_Angel_Shay
Thank you everybody for the positive reinforcement!  
19 Jul 10 by member: Kasper2010

     
 

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