Diet Snobbery- Anyone else notice this?

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Ibleedlipsti...

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 96

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 17:45
Has anyone else noticed the snobbish attitudes involved in weight loss?

Examples:

Diet soda- if you drink it, you are severely frowned upon.

Organic- it is the way to go. Any sort of eating out, even Subway, is bad.

"Fad" diets- any sort of way of eating other than your own is instantly a fad, even if it works for them.

Diet pills- if you use Phentermine, Meridia, or Alli as a tool, it is bad and you should have better self control.

Weight loss surgery- If you are considering this, you get flamed and told millions of horror stories. You should have more self control.

Fat bias- if you have lost 50lbs and are no longer obese/overweight, you no longer need any sort of support, and you are just like all of the other evil thin people.



These frustrate me to bits. I recently went in to a local Weight Watcher's group to consider joining- something for real life support. I carry my weight well, and I also wear flattering clothing. I have a Marilyn Monroe curviness, and I don't look too bad fully clothed. I certainly don't look overweight, even though I am.

The majority of the group is severely overweight, and they all looked at me like I don't belong. I have lost over 70lbs already, and I just wanted continuing support for my last few lbs. But because I am not obese, they didn't view me as someone who was with them in the fight for health.

My mum had gastric bypass two years ago. When she told people she was getting it done, she got horror stories and was told she was lazy/needed more self control. Whenever she looked online, she got horror stories. But she still had it done, and it saved her life.

She is happy, healthy, and back to running marathons- no problems whatsoever. She is off all of her previous meds. She sticks to a healthy, well balanced low carb diet- she still has to make good food choices, because the surgery didn't "cure" her obesity problem- it just gave her a smaller stomach.

The truth is that the people who had a successful experience with gastric bypass aren't spending their days online, they are out living their lives.

The truth is that people can lose weight eating processed foods, drinking diet soda, and can use prescription, FDA approved diet pills to assist their journey, and people really do lose weight on Atkins.

And just because I look slim and confident, I am really just a cheesecake away from 200+lbs, and could use a support group.

Has anyone else noticed this in the general diet community?

*I am not posting this to start an argument, or to be a troll. I was honestly wondering if anyone else had noticed these attitudes, both online and in real life.
I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night - Galileo

First goal: 149 by 10/31/10

Second goal: 139 by 11/31/10

Final goal for 2010: 129 by 12/31/10
a_mckinley

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 7

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 18:02
I COMPLETELY understand!! i'm so sorry you're having to deal with these self-absorbed people. At my highest, I was up to 285lbs and completely unhappy. I worked really hard and got down to 202, lots of encouragement and support. Then it stopped. Being about 5'9", and apparently carrying my weight well, the support stopped. People even started calling me obsessive for still "claiming" i had more weight to lose... they would roll their eyes and say I've lost the weight, now i can move on. they never understood that i still had 65 pounds to go!! they just gave me grief and told me i was being silly and should just be happy, and that i didn't understand what they were struggling with and why they couldn't lose their weight...

unfortunately, i'm one of those people that desperately needs happy, encouraging support. so, i stopped trying. now, i've gained 40 pounds back and am incredibly frustrated with myself. now, i have a little more understanding of the people in my life and i can "turn on my guard" when i am near them. and i am trying to just stick to my plan and not them affect me so much.

i hope you can find the support you're looking for. know that you're not alone!!!!

wishing you the best.
Jaydajedi

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 23

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 18:07
I would have to agree that if your not willing to give up soda and achool your really not wanting to lose weight. those are the 2 biggest sabbatures of any diet.not trying to be mean but why would you want to drink your calories then have to starve yourself or gain weight. makes no sense. I dont think that people are being snobs about it just think most people stress that if you continue to do those to things your kinda wasting your time dieting. i would rather have a large plate of wheat pasta red suace and 2 big chicken breast for the same calories as a big gulp.
k8yk

Joined: Jan 09
Posts: 4,546

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 18:18
Everyone has opinions about different diets. Lots of those opinions come from personal experience. You have to take what you can use and smile and nod at the rest. It happens no matter what you weigh and no matter how you lose weight. If someone had a poor experience with a particular plan or diet, I hope they continue to share that! But in the end we have to make our own decisions.

I understand that only you know your body best, but if you are already slim looking, why do you want to lose 50 more pounds? 105 pounds is a VERY low weight. Sometimes the people around you who love you see something you don't see. Is it possible that you really don't need to los 50 pounds and that doing so would be harmful to your health? It is worth considering that people around you might simply have your best interest at heart.
My blog, This is not a Diet:
http://notsobigk.wordpress.com
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skinnygirl13...

Joined: May 10
Posts: 79

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 18:40
Everyone has two cents to put in, even on here. I try to buddy people who like to support you and not gasp at a coke when they see it. I think when people really have your best interest in mind they will pull you aside or send an email letting you know the concerns they have and not give you a lecture in public or on a site. Just my two cents, Lol. Good luck to you
Jaydajedi

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 23

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 18:56
I wasnt lecturing any one I was pretty clear why people act the way they do about this subject. and that the truth is they are right. I have alot of exsperiance on this issue. Before I got several auto immune diseases and migrains a few years back I was a maneger of 15 million dollor fitness club and before that I was in charge of the overweight people in my unit in the army. The army is really smart about the way they have soldiers loose weight. The first thing that goes is every liquid not water and the weight just comes off. I m thinkfull I dont drink caloried drinks very often if i did when i got sick i would weighed 400lbs instead of 270 when i finally got of my butt and started getting back in shape.
leahl

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 315

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 19:40
I welcome most diet advice (and advice in general), and then decide whether I should revisit this advice later. But I think more important than what is said is how it is delivered. I think there's a difference between coming from a place of "concern" and coming from a place of "snobby". If I feel like there is condescension behind what someone is saying, or if they are completely off base, then I file it away in the "trash" bin of my brain. lol
skinnygirl13...

Joined: May 10
Posts: 79

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 20:00
Jaydajedi, sorry I was not commenting on your post. Sorry if you took it that way. This is what I was going to say even if your post was not in here. Like I said I try not to have buddies that say negative things and I don't do it either, I am on here for support and to support others.
Jaydajedi

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 23

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 20:16
no its cool I'm not a mean person but I call it like I see it and due to my body making almost no hormoans I tend to come off kinda that way and tend to be sensitive a little. It's hard going thru menapuase as a 36 yr old man. But I do know when it comes to weight loss body builders have always known best. anyone that can eat 6000- 8000 calories a day and have less than 10% bf must know something. hard work lots of water and sleep and eating really works. I waste none of my calories on liquid other than no fat milk and I loose 2-3 lbs aweek while gaining 2-4 lbs a month in lean muscle.
cbizzell13

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 24

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 20:26
I understand where you are coming from. I try to have a healthy eating habit but it does not always work out that way. I promote the 50% raw diet because it makes sense to me. I also promote free range meats because I have produced an allergy to a lot of antibiotics and have elevated hormones. My nutritionists said that it "could be" cause by eating meats with antibiotics and hormones in them. So I go free range to keep the antibiotics and hormones out. But I will say one thing I have tried the Atkins and it worked for my husband, not for me. I did Curves for years and lost about 150-200 lbs. That was great and I worked hard at it but when I moved and went to another Curves the women there were rude and pushy on there own diets. Whatever diet you are on as long as it is working for you and not jeopardizing your health (diet pills have very adverse side effects that cause more damage than good so I don't really promote them but if you want to take them that is your prerogative) or you have consulted with your Dr about it then I say go for it. I don't just go out and do something that is going to effect my body without consulting my Dr first and that includes the "fad" diets. I have done just about everything besides surgery (it scares me) to loose my weight and I am doing what my Dr has asked me to. I think people should look at it that way. If it hurts more than it helps then I just won't do it.
It is all good though and a few suggestions here and there are not bad.
Candice Bizzell
"No one really starts out kind. All we know how to do at first is want. We want food, we want attention...it's just natural survival instinct, I guess...but kindness is something that we all have to learn as we go. It's something that grows and develops slowly over time...the same way our bodies do..."-Tohru Honda Fruits Basket
lilsmurf74

Joined: Jun 10
Posts: 36

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 20:34
I get it. Everyone looks at me as if I'm crazy when I tell them I'm on Atkins because there is still a stigma of eating a pound of bacon every day. I just nod and smile, because I know it's working for me. I've read every book on every diet out there, because it feels like I have tried them all. And all of them give conflicting reports. So I can understand the confusion and perception of "snobbishness" because everyone believes that their diet is the best for everyone. Luckily, everyone is different and different diets work for different body types and shapes and attitudes. Lifestyle changes are different than diets. This site doesn't promote diets. It promotes lifestyle changes, whatever method works for you.
Leslie

"Everything Happens for a Reason"

"Slow and steady loses the weight"
shellie77

Joined: Jul 10
Posts: 27

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:13
Jaydajedi, no one said anything about drinking high calorie drinks. She said diet sodas, not regular soda.

And I do agree with the diet snobbery. I don't eat organic, heck I eat a lot of processed foods too! I'm doing a fad diet, take Alli when I eat something high in fat, I drink diet soda, and I considered lapband surgery once.

I do feel like some people (NOT ALL) act like they are better than you if you don't eat organic, or eat the same way they do. Everyone has their way of losing weight.

I'm losing weight, and I feel great!
Canajun

Joined: May 10
Posts: 507

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:22
I totally agree with Leah.

I also think that everyone has to come to their own conclusions about maintaining their optimal health. Notice, I say health and not weight. Coming from the health angle, I do feel that most people will ultimately wind up in the same place. I think some of the perceived snobbery may be life lessons that some of us have picked up along the way and would like to share with folks.

Even constructive criticism is hard to take. I learned that from many years of managing people. Don't even get me started on performance reviews. Razz


If you sometimes feel a little useless, offended or depressed, always remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious little sperm out of millions!
Jaydajedi

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 23

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:34
diet sodas are almost as bad as regular and actually have some things in them that are worse. diet sodas have almost the same effect on the brain as extacy and its been proven that most people actually still gain wieght while switching from regular sodas to diet. but like i said if its not worth giving up soda in any form it must not be worth reaching your goals.
leahl

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 315

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:37
I'm drinking soda and eating pizza and still losing weight. Does that mean I'm not dedicated enough?
Jaydajedi

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 23

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:45
i eat pizza to so what really 9 lbs in 9 months i guess if thats working for you only 4 years 3 months left to you hit your goal. didnt ever expext to be so nasty to someone but i diffently didnt exspect to be attack for sharing proven info.
ctlss

Joined: Mar 10
Posts: 2,452

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:48
I truly believe that every person deserves to be treated with respect and that we all deserve full support on this journey no matter what path we have decided to take. For instance, K8yk has lost 100 pounds using calorie counting, and it works awesome for her. Unfortunately, it doesn't work for me. Does that mean that I should look down my nose at her? Absolutely not. And I am pretty sure that she feels the same way I do, that we all deserve respect, civility, support, and motivation equally, no matter what life style we choose!!
Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.
~Marcel Proust~

The hippopatamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Could it be that human nutritionists are on the wrong track?
~Erma Bombeck~

"Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it. "
~Groucho Marx~


ctlss
Canajun

Joined: May 10
Posts: 507

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:50
Jay, I'm missing something. Were you attacked in another thread? I don't see it here.


If you sometimes feel a little useless, offended or depressed, always remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious little sperm out of millions!
leahl

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 315

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:51
I wasn't being nasty, I was just asking a question. You're the one dishing out insults. Also, my weight tracker is not correct, I've actually lost around 20 pounds. I'm not on a time crunch like a lot of people and I don't weigh in very often. It's not the most important thing to me.

If you're going to be rude, I suggest you proofread because your posts are distractingly misspelled.
keithd112

Joined: Mar 10
Posts: 204

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Posted: 06 Sep 2010, 21:52
Jaydajedi wrote:
diet sodas are almost as bad as regular and actually have some things in them that are worse. diet sodas have almost the same effect on the brain as extacy and its been proven that most people actually still gain wieght while switching from regular sodas to diet. but like i said if its not worth giving up soda in any form it must not be worth reaching your goals.


Thats not true. Most people I know drink diet soda because it satisfies their sweet tooth and they loose weight. I drank diet soda throughout my diet and I continued to loose weight and I drink A LOT of it.
Granted its not great for you but it only causes weight gain in people who use it as an excuse to take those 0 calorie beverages to indulge in sweets.

Train hard expect results



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