Facing Reality

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Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 10:54
First time I've posted. I thought it was important for me to say hi and come out with it. I was doing so well and got off track and lost focus. I started eating without abandon.

What brought me back was pain. I seem to be on the cusp of some kind of weight threshold. Gain a few pounds and the pain in my hip gets excruciating. Lose a few and I get relief. This is no longer about aesthetics. I quit smoking for my health and for my kids and its time I started seeing my weight in the same light.

Thanks for listening Smile
Glaun

Joined: Jun 13
Posts: 673

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 10:56
Glad to have you back on Jeld. We have all been there. It's nice to be among friends at to be able to be honest.
Good luck.

The Perfect Speed
"any number is a limit, and perfection doesn't have limits.
Perfect speed, my son, is being there.”
Chiang from "Jonathan Livingston Seagull
Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 11:02
Thank you very much Glaun SmileI'm someone who values honesty above all else. Funny how hard it is to be honest with ourselves. The truth shall set you free...
tonym1967

Joined: Oct 12
Posts: 49

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 11:08
Well done on given up smoking, its not easy.

You sound well motivated, this will see you through your journey I am sure Smile
Your body, your choice, heed advice, not instructions.
Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 11:19
Thanks Tonym1967 Its been over 4 years now, not looking back. It doesn't bother me at all, its really like I never smoked.

I have conquered many things, but this food thing is a different kind of adversary. In a way, its easy to quit smoking. The minute you stop smoking, you are a non smoker. Pretty simple. But you can't stop eating.

I also suffer from a mild form of bipolar disorder called Cyclothymia. It causes changes in my thoughts, energy levels, and appetite, among others. Its a real crapshoot. While some days I don't want to eat a thing, other days I want to eat as much as possible. I guess I will learn how to navigate it as I go, as long as I'm honest and don't give up.
dandelionSKY

Joined: Nov 11
Posts: 55

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 11:22
Hello to ya. Yep, know what you mean, most of us here have been there - glad to see you've made the positive move of coming back and don't be afraid to post again; for whatever you may need Smile
Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 11:25
Thank you tincamathews Smile
kkd1125

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 336

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 12:13
Hi Jeld! I love the title of your post, "Facing Reality." It's this concept that seems to help people finally make lasting changes to lead a healthy lifestyle rather than try new fad diets every other month and play mind games with themselves such as "cheating" or only tracking when they're "being good."

I feel like being real with myself starting at the beginning of this year has been what has helped me finally lose weight fairly effortlessly and push past a weight point that I haven't crossed in 20 years. When I say "effortlessly," I don't mean it hasn't been hard work (like 5:30 am workouts and saying no to office goodies almost every day). I mean my mental outlook on being healthy is different, so making good choices for my body feels more natural and even exciting to me.

Congrats on the quitting smoking. Good luck on the weight loss efforts and come back to the message boards often to let us know how you're doing.
Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 23 Jul 2013, 13:01
Thanks kkd1125 Smile

Here's to good choices!
scrapinkathy

Joined: Jun 10
Posts: 47

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Posted: 24 Jul 2013, 18:07
Hi Jeld! I also like the title "Facing Reality" I too have pain and it was the pain that finally made me make this a lifestyle change instead of a diet. Since it's a life change and it's for life when I have a bad day I don't beat myself up as badly as I did when I was yoyo dieting for vanity. I know it took me a long time to gain the weight and learn the bad habits. It will take awhile to relearn new ones. Just keep trudging along. With each month new habits will form. I surprise myself with some of the good choices I make now without thinking. Like drinking water, I hated it but now crave it.


2010 - lost 40 lbs on fad diet, gained it all back
Oct 2012 weighed 221at Dr's office, started WW
Jan 2013 = 214, New year and new attitude
May 2013 under 200 Yeah!
*Goal 180 by Sept 2013
*Goal 165 by Christmas 2013.
Jeld

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 19

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 10:28
Thanks scrapinkathy! Smile
jwill77nc2

Joined: Jan 13
Posts: 108

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 15:00
Welcome - I have been where you are, to quote you "eating without abandon". I know it's hard to get back on track, but you can do it. I think this website is very helpful in achieving your weight goals. Best of luck in your journey.
kingkeld

Joined: Sep 09
Posts: 1,995

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 15:32
Jeld (which is strangely close to MY name), from one "old" member to another - I'm here to tell you that FatSecret IS the place to be for weight loss and maintenance. I'm living proof of that.
I couldn't possibly have done it without the FatSecret tools and the awesome gang of members that are here to help and support.
They other guys are absolutely right - "Facing reality" is very much what we need to do to buckle down and really get to the bottom of this - lose the weight and STAY slim. It's work, but not harder than you want it to be. It takes focus, but you're allowed to stray. Nobody's perfect, and we don't have to be. Just do your best, clear out all the "weight loss noise" about what works and what doesn't and what systems are better than others, and just follow what Fatsecret suggests - lower your calorie intake and up your exercise. It works.
Feel free to add me as a buddy if you'd like. Smile

Keld.

Visit my website: www.tabdig.info

"Losing weight is never about eating as little as possible"
- Kingkeld.
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.
― Eleanor Roosevelt
"Do. Or do not. There is no trying."
- Master Yoda.

I went from morbidly obese to being the owner of TABDIG - a weight loss coaching service that helps people worldwide losing weight. It's been an amazing journey. From October 4th 2010 to April 3rd 2012 I lost half my body weight - 80 kilos/170 lbs. Since then, I have had two cosmetic surgeries to remove excess skin. I have now quadrupled my strength, gained several kilos in muscle mass, and today I focus on building muscle, optimizing my diet, living healthy and helping people to reach the very same goals. I am stronger, healthier, thinner, happier! If you feel that you need help losing weight, don't hesitate to send me an inbox message.
kkd1125

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 336

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 15:57
kingkeld, reading your line "...clear out all the "weight loss noise" about what works and what doesn't and what systems are better than others..." made me want to share something. My office at work is right off our main kitchen/lunch room. So for about 2 hours every day I hear people prepping their lunches and every day I hear discussions between the women (all the younger ones, in their 20's) talking about what "diet" or "cleanse" they are on. Needless to say, not a single one of them looks like they need to lose even 5 lbs. There have been times when I wanted to jump out of my chair and go in there and school them on a simpler, healthy way to lose fat and be healthy if they only use common sense! But I don't want to be the preacher.

I don't share my secret to success since none of my co-workers has commented on my weight loss so far at -33 lbs. I think since I have so much to lose, and it's happened so gradually (over 6.5 months now) they just don't see it. I've been here 7 years and I'm smaller than I've ever been while working here, but nobody notices. For a while it bothered me. But now I'm just wondering if someone will look at me one day when I've lost 50 or 75 lbs. and ask, "Did you get a new haircut?" Ha ha!

Ponky82

Joined: Jul 13
Posts: 13

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 16:55
kkd1125: They DO notice but they won't tell. I've lost 33 lbs too since I began this journey, and I can count with 1 hand the people who have told me a comment about my weight loss, and, just like you, I though nobody noticed because I was/am so fat.

But no.

People don't tell for 3 reasons: either they envy you and don't want to admit it, they're scared, or they think you'll feel uncomfortable talking about your weight (even if it's weight loss).

I can tell you that because I've felt like that. A co-worker started dieting and exercising after I did, and she's lost a lot of weight. I don't say "wow! how much have you lost?" because I envy her: she started AFTER I did, and she looks better! while I have been on this journey for a long time, and my weight loss is so slow (I have hypothyroidism AND plantar fasciitis, so it sucks to be me).

Also, I'm afraid I'll tell her she's lost weight, she'll talk about all the things she's doing, while I'll be expecting a "you've lost weight too!" that might never come, and that would disappoint me because it'll mean that what I was thinking is true: "NOBODY NOTICES". So, I choose not to say anything.

And sometimes, I don't know if I should tell her because I think telling her "you've lost weight" might be the same as saying "you're fat, you've been sooo fat and you looked horrendous, thank God you did something about it".

Don't worry about what others think, and don't expect them to say anything. As long as you notice you look better everyday and your clothes fit better... YOU KNOW IT SHOWS.

Conviction, Perseverance and Patience... MUCH Patience.

Ultimate goal: 75 kg
kkd1125

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 336

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 17:34
Thanks, Ponky82. I will heed your advice. Luckily, my husband and my parents notice (and my kids might even admit to seeing a difference if asked directly). And every morning I swear my dog gives me a thumbs up when I get dressed. (Ha!)
kingkeld

Joined: Sep 09
Posts: 1,995

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Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 22:36
I experienced the same - in the beginning, nobody noticed or said anything. I think it was partially what Ponky82 is talking about, but also simply the fact that dropping 50 lbs when you start at 360 really doesn't make much of a dent.
...of course now people KEEP commenting how I'm still losing weight, even if I haven't really lost anything worth mentioning in ages. Smile
You will also see that the times that most people notice weight loss is the times when you're weight loss has stalled. Weird, but true. I've had this happen every single time I hit any kind of plateau.

I do make a point of telling people about my experiences when they start talking about "this new diet they're on". I'll flat out tell them that it won't work and why (if this is my opinion, of course). I will then tell them what works. Count your calories, eat right, move more. It's NOT magic. Sure, a few of us have other challenges on top of that, but for the vast majority, this is what makes the difference. And even those that have other issues can generally benefit from this. Clear the weight loss clutter, make the journey simple. This makes it a LOT harder to fail. Smile

Visit my website: www.tabdig.info

"Losing weight is never about eating as little as possible"
- Kingkeld.
"You wouldn't worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.
― Eleanor Roosevelt
"Do. Or do not. There is no trying."
- Master Yoda.

I went from morbidly obese to being the owner of TABDIG - a weight loss coaching service that helps people worldwide losing weight. It's been an amazing journey. From October 4th 2010 to April 3rd 2012 I lost half my body weight - 80 kilos/170 lbs. Since then, I have had two cosmetic surgeries to remove excess skin. I have now quadrupled my strength, gained several kilos in muscle mass, and today I focus on building muscle, optimizing my diet, living healthy and helping people to reach the very same goals. I am stronger, healthier, thinner, happier! If you feel that you need help losing weight, don't hesitate to send me an inbox message.
Diablo360x

Joined: Jul 11
Posts: 817

      quote  
Posted: 25 Jul 2013, 23:25
kingkeld wrote:
I will then tell them what works. Count your calories, eat right, move more. It's NOT magic. Sure, a few of us have other challenges on top of that, but for the vast majority, this is what makes the difference. And even those that have other issues can generally benefit from this. Clear the weight loss clutter, make the journey simple. This makes it a LOT harder to fail. Smile


Amen.
Love your food or risk failure. No quick fixes, this is a lifestyle change. No extremes are needed just consistency.
Rita41

Joined: Apr 13
Posts: 186

      quote  
Posted: 26 Jul 2013, 06:32
kingkeld wrote:
It's work, but not harder than you want it to be. It takes focus, but you're allowed to stray. Nobody's perfect, and we don't have to be. Just do your best, clear out all the "weight loss noise" about what works and what doesn't and what systems are better than others, and just follow what Fatsecret suggests - lower your calorie intake and up your exercise. It works.

Keld.


I agree. There is no magic pill you have to be ready to do the "work"...whether that means watching what you eat or tying your walking shoes and following a routine. You have to wrap your head around that first. When you are ready you will be able to keep at it. Your body will thank you.
qapl

Joined: Jun 13
Posts: 16

      quote  
Posted: 26 Jul 2013, 06:46
KKD1125 your earlier post made me laugh (in the most positive way) particulary the hair cut quote!! it was just what i needed :0)



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