I've been on FS just over a month longer than you have. And I can very much relate to the sometimes feeling quite alone, partially because I'm a complete nutter
and partially because it took me quite a while to start to get to know a few people. But once I have, it's been great and I've been able to get different perspectives on things.
It looks to me like a lot interaction happens between people once they have started to get to know each other and start to make buddies. This can be a bit of slow process...e.g. sometimes I post on the forums, or join challenges, etc. And often it does feel a little bit like going back to high school when you first join a social site like FS.
I'll be upfront and say I did take a bit of a look at your profile when I saw you talking about having posted thoughts, helping others, and offering support. I could see 5 forum posts: of those one of them was this one, one of them was more of a lovely statement that you posted about the same time as this one, 2 responses about a month ago, and a post asking for support, to which some people indeed offered support (but it didn't look like you had responded to any of those). I also looked at your journal, and yes I that you do occasionally post entries. I'm not sure, maybe you have been around to a lot of people journals (which in my experience often doesn't generate a lot of responses). The groups I can never tell, they are almost always quiet (I think in part due to their lack of easy navigation). So I guess what I'm saying to you here is I don't think that you are a bad person
, I'm just wondering whether you are putting yourself out there enough
Because personally, when you talk about it being all hype, and wanting support but getting nothing, and not being a supportive place, I guess I don't feel like that. As socially awkward as I am, combined with the feeling that I simply can't send people buddy requests for fear of unleasing my brand of crazy on them, I still have been able to find a few really awesome people who are there. Some times it's about what you make of it.
In short, you are not alone and you are not a bad person
, just in place where it's not possible to see someone physically standing beside you, hence the need to reach out and say "hey, I'm here and I wanna chat"