Spouse Not Supportive

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NCNOLE

Joined: Feb 11
Posts: 1,218

      quote  
Posted: 10 May 2012, 14:22
Ditto - that is a good quote. I am responsible for what I choose to eat. Period.
posterchild6...

Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 107

      quote  
Posted: 10 May 2012, 15:07
Congrats on joining this community! There are lots of ladies here to support you, and a few guys..

Don't look too hard into it. I have been "that guy" a long time ago. My wife would try to make me eat healthy, and I resented it mainly because I just wanted junk food, lol. Also some people dont like being pushed. Perhaps some healthy food that tastes good and is filling will turn him around. Not only that once you start losing weight and regaining your figure, umm, he will like it.

Now the tables are turned and my wife is now joining me on the journey. It's tough. We're all individuals with our own reasons for stuff, try not to make it into some personal agenda or anything.

/Cheers, JP
coconutprinc...

Joined: Feb 12
Posts: 113

      quote  
Posted: 10 May 2012, 16:58
posterchild66 wrote:
Congrats on joining this community! There are lots of ladies here to support you, and a few guys..

Don't look too hard into it. I have been "that guy" a long time ago. My wife would try to make me eat healthy, and I resented it mainly because I just wanted junk food, lol. Also some people dont like being pushed. Perhaps some healthy food that tastes good and is filling will turn him around. Not only that once you start losing weight and regaining your figure, umm, he will like it.

Now the tables are turned and my wife is now joining me on the journey. It's tough. We're all individuals with our own reasons for stuff, try not to make it into some personal agenda or anything.

/Cheers, JP


Thank you so much Smile I hope that my hubby comes around when he sees how great I start looking Smile
coconutprinc...

Joined: Feb 12
Posts: 113

      quote  
Posted: 10 May 2012, 16:58
NCNOLE wrote:
Ditto - that is a good quote. I am responsible for what I choose to eat. Period.


Isn't it? No excuses with that one.
coconutprinc...

Joined: Feb 12
Posts: 113

      quote  
Posted: 10 May 2012, 16:59
debbily wrote:
coconutprincess wrote:
[quote=holfraz]I am the one who is responsible for what I choose to eat. No one can keep me at my desired weight except fo rmyself. Life is full of temptations. We have to decide what is the most important to us: giving in to temptations and feeling bad about it, or reaching our desired weight and feeling on top of the world!


I too want to print this out so that I can see it everywhere in my house on a daily basis!!Life is full of temptations, even at home. We have to be super strong to be able to overcome what is thrown in our faces! I love will power!!


Yes we are! Smile
Sillycee2

Joined: May 12
Posts: 8

      quote  
Posted: 05 Jun 2012, 17:26
LOL..! Wow.. and I thought I was the only one whose husband acted like that... It's funny, they would "like" us to look our best,and will do nothing to help the cause. My husband last Friday night bought Taco Bell, and a Fifth of Tequila home with him after he got off work, for "dinner". Let me say this: my husband weighs a whopping 168 lbs, and is 5' 7".. and has been that way for the 8 years we have been married! yeah... eats EVERYTHING in sight. He knows that I am dedicated to getting this weight off, and says to me sweetly, " but honey it won't hurt you to have some of this.. will it.. just one time??" I responded with a smart a$$ reply followed by something that cannot be posted on here. Sigh..... thats support for ya. lol.. but I stuck to my guns grumpily, and made it through. I also give my husband a choice of menu options for dinner.. if he doesn't like my suggestions, he can cook for himself. After about a week of disagreeing with me on food choices I gave him, and making his own dinner, he now magically likes what I offer him... hehe! It's like Husband 101 noob training all over again!
I'm not a big ice cream eater.. so I keep alot of that on hand, I also buy chips that I don't like(which he likes) and throw them in the cupboard.. theres other things I get him to keep him out of my hair, and away from the foods I buy for me. So far it's working, but then again.. it's only been 6 weeks for me... Smile
finance337

Joined: Apr 12
Posts: 14

      quote  
Posted: 05 Jun 2012, 21:26
my husband is never supportive with my diets, but after all these years I just tell him I am on a diet and I cook so he has to eat what I cook or he can go buy fast food. We have been together forever so I guess we have that kind of relationship that may not work for you, but you do have to be responsible for your food. Usually my hubby comes around but it never fails, the first day I am on my diet he asks if I want to go to breakfast! Take it in stride stress only makes you gain weight. Smile
wiener4

Joined: Sep 10
Posts: 22

      quote  
Posted: 05 Jun 2012, 21:32
My husband and I can not seem to "time" our weight loss efforts simultaneously. Either he is competing in a "Biggest Losers" contest at work while I slip into a sedentary state or he is making secret trips to the Dairy Queen while I ride my bike eight miles. If only we could get our stuff together and get healthy TOGETHER! Odd dynamic!
coconutprinc...

Joined: Feb 12
Posts: 113

      quote  
Posted: 06 Jun 2012, 12:10
Thanks for the replies Smile So far, I've been able to stand firm. Sometimes I really have to make myself OBEY lol I have literally contemplated for about an hour in my head whether or not I should buy the big bag of chips or the little bag. It's a huge struggle for me, but I am responsible for what goes into my mouth, whether he is on board with me or not. Most times I just ignore him lol
RoosterCogbu...

Joined: Jun 12
Posts: 8

      quote  
Posted: 06 Jun 2012, 22:30
Fascinating topic. I've thought a lot about this issue throughout my journey and it's more common than people think. I like to call it "familial sabotage," but I think it goes farther than that for many.

Husband/wife that unintentionally tries to derail your diet?
Parent's that get offended you won't eat their lasagna?
Grandma gets offended you won't eat her signature pecan pie?
Coworkers continue to bring in fast food for lunch everyday?
Skinny (or overweight but don't care-ish) best friends that want to go get drinks and eat the unhealthiest things?

It's like a slap in the face. Trust me, I know. I didn't get fat because I hated food, and getting constant temptation from people who love you is frustrating. My co-workers would literally buy me burgers or tacos etc., even when I said "NO." It's almost insulting, but it gets better. At first I'd slip away and throw the things they bought me out. I felt guilty about it, but it's my life, only I can be responsible for failure or success. The more you say "no," in time, they stop asking.

Stay steadfast and as you continue to shrink they'll be scratching their heads thinking, "oh crap he/she is serious." Then you'll be the one they come to for advice. Sometimes they'll even get on board and join you because they'll see the fruits of your hard work and realize that it's not an intangible goal. Okay sorry for the rant lol.



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