How to deal with critics

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Joined: Mar 10
Posts: 79

Posted: 09 Apr 2010, 21:56
Lol that is so true Jen. I can be a sass master when I want to be and I don't think I could have controlled myself!

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 41

Posted: 10 Apr 2010, 08:44
jenju wrote:
"How much money do you make? You know, if you wear a skirt, put some make up on and shake your ass a little, you could probably get a raise"

Haha. I love it jenju! Laughing

Next time anyone tries to talk to me about my weight I'm going to tell them to shake their ass to get a raise or in the case of university an A. Very Happy

When someone tries or says anything about my weight they usually get quite a sassy answer. Bad Grin

My current favorite is;
"So, your saying I'm fat?"
"Thanks for the newsflash buddy!"
"But the thing is, I can lose weight, and do so quite successfully."
"You on the other hand are ugly, you can't lose ugly, can you?"
"Oh.. and by the state of your outfit, I know your broke ass, can't afford plastic surgery"

Wink So far it sure does the trick! Razz
Dressing up. People just don’t do it anymore. We have to change that. - John Galliano

Nothing tastes as good as thin feels

A woman needs 4 animals in her life. A mink in her wardrobe, a jaguar in her garage, a tiger in her bed and an ass to pay for everything
Paris Hilton


♥ Get to 88.5-Latin Tattoo
♥ Get to 84.1- NO LONGER OBESE, I'm just overweight hehe
♥ Get to 76-Lotus Tattoo
♥ Get to 70-Traditional Maori Tattoo I AM NOW OF NORMAL WEIGHT
♥ Get to 67.5-I have officially lost my weight in fat.

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Joined: Jan 09
Posts: 4,546

Posted: 10 Apr 2010, 12:58
This reminds me of when I used to smoke. I was standing in a park smoking a cigarette and a woman came up to me and said,
"You know that's going to give you cancer, right?"
And I threw my cigarette down on the ground, stomped it out and said,
"Oh my god, I had no idea! Thank you so much, you saved my life!"
And walked away.

Lol Smile
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Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 5

Posted: 10 Apr 2010, 14:16
I am a female firefighter and I am FOREVER getting comments from the guys if I pick up a cookie THEIR wives have sent in , such as 'you really need that?' as they eyeball by backside or pat my belly. Normally I shrug it off and tell them ' it takes alot of work to keep my ass this big, but its a sacrifice i'll make'.. I know im gonna be subject to those kinds of remarks in that kind of a work environment, and fortunately Im not sensitive, but weight to women is like hair loss to men. I would NEVER comment about one of them losing their hair.. such a double standard.

Joined: Apr 08
Posts: 56

Posted: 10 Apr 2010, 18:32
How insane! You deserve much better treatment & sensitivity from your coworks. On the other hand use it for motivation to lose that'll show em I truly admire what you do.

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 315

Posted: 12 Apr 2010, 08:56
My father-in-law told me that I needed to lose weight (uhh, thanks?). My feelings were so hurt that I didn't say anything and walked away Sad Who says something like that? It especially hurt because I had been dieting for several weeks and had actually lost 7 pounds! wtf??

Joined: Feb 10
Posts: 408

Posted: 12 Apr 2010, 09:15
My father-in-law told his daughter one Christmas in front of everyone that she was as big as a mountain! I can't believe how people can be so rude and hurtful sometimes. At least we can come here for HELPFUL support!

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 13

Posted: 12 Apr 2010, 10:05
The best way to deal with them? Ignore them, adapt a healthier lifestyle, and laugh in their face when you look better, feel better and are healthier than them.

If someone is making these types of comments, they're either insecure or (less likely) trying to help in their own misguided way. Grow thicker skin (figuratively of course) and do your best to not let them get to you. Before you know it, they'll have nothing left to criticize you about and you'll be in the best shape of your life.

EDIT: One more thing. Of course nothing excuses this type of behavior, but if you allow it to get to you, you are letting them achieve their desired effect. It never feels good when someone tries to tear you down but it's up to YOU to make sure that you don't let it affect you. It may sound cliche, but only losers feel sorry for themselves.

Joined: Mar 09
Posts: 142

Posted: 12 Apr 2010, 15:45
Chicholicious wrote:
I want to know if anyone goes thru this at some point. Me on the other hand is constantly. I have people at work friends and family. Who think just because they are thin it gives them the right to lecture me about my weight. Just a few minutes ago I pass down the hall and see a coworker of mine who stops me mid way and says "have you consider joining herbal life?". I told her I'm already in a diet and she says good you should, be serious about how your weight is affecting your health. Dah! Einstein.

Best advice I can offer is to smile, nod, and let them know that while you appreciate their concern and advice, you have already begun a program aimed at improving your physical health. Anything they try to add at this point is very likely to be detrimental to your successfully finishing your program.

Alternatively, start going into excruciating detail. Every weigh-in, every calorie, all the sacrifices. Everything. Hopefully they'll just drop it right there for fear of being roped in again. Wink

twpietz37 wrote:
Grow thicker skin (figuratively of course) and do your best to not let them get to you. Before you know it, they'll have nothing left to criticize you about and you'll be in the best shape of your life.

EDIT: One more thing. Of course nothing excuses this type of behavior, but if you allow it to get to you, you are letting them achieve their desired effect. It never feels good when someone tries to tear you down but it's up to YOU to make sure that you don't let it affect you. It may sound cliche, but only losers feel sorry for themselves.

You put that very well. Ultimately, this is all anyone can do. Remember, they're free to say what they will (so long as it isn't slander or libel) no matter what. So, if you have people around you who feel that making jackasses of themselves is appropriate, well, growing a thicker skin is the only course available.

Phoenixrayne wrote:
Seriously. Nobody has the right to tell you what to do with your body.


Pot - meet Kettle

Really? Cross-thread drama? Impressive. I read that thread, and I'll say this; at no point were you told to stop the diet, just that there are concerns from a lot of people about it. It is up to you, of course, on whether you feel you know enough about the diet and its possible side effects. You weren't attacked, there was no personal remark made, but it appears that criticism of a potentially unsafe diet has affected you at a deep emotional level. Consider separating your diet plan from your self-image. It is a much more emotionally healthy way to live life.

Joined: Feb 10
Posts: 401

Posted: 12 Apr 2010, 15:47
To me it's rude to talk to anyone about their weight. But some people don't think so at all. My boyfriend's mom told me once that it looked like I had gained some weight. It hurt my feelings, but apparently, she didn't mean anything by it.
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170 - 50 pounds gone! (reached October 2, 2010)
155 - no longer overweight! (reached January 22, 2011)
145 - 75 Pounds gone! (reached May 14, 2011)
135 - ultimate goal weight!

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Joined: Apr 10
Posts: 13

Posted: 26 Apr 2010, 01:16
So far i've lost 20 lbs in about 33 days on the hcg diet & over 20 inches! do u think any of THEM have noticed or said anything POSITIVE OR ENCOURAGING???? Of course not?

They're NOT really concerned or CARE about me -- THEY just want to drag around their little cloud and spread some rain & gloom everywhere they go.

Nowadays i'm on a CRUSADE -- if they say anything negative about my weight, like the infamous 'Are u pregnant?' or "when are u due?" -- I look them straight in the eye and say "No, I am not AND I am very offended and hurt that u would ask me that. I sincerely hope that u have learned ur lesson and will never ever be that rude and insensitive again! You should NEVER ask someone about their weight or if they are pregnant, no more so then u would ask them how old they are, or how much money do u make. If u didn't know that before, please learn it now. I don't ever want you to offend anyone again the way you just did to me. Ok? Do you understand?"

By then their jaw is usually on the floor and they are apologizing profusely and then i say something like -- "ok, I guess i can forgive you, since you didn't know any better, but can u please promise me that u will never do that again to anybody? I'll feel much better knowing that u have learned your lesson..."---

It works like a CHARM -- every time!! As a matter of fact, usually a few days later they come up to me and apologize AGAIN and ask me how i'm doing and THEN when they are talking to me as a PERSON, instead of as a FATTY, i tell them what i'm doing and how much weight i've lost and they actually start saying some encouraging things! TRY IT -- It's actually FUN once you've done it a few times.
“. . . Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?” 1 Corinthians 6:19, NAS

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