I'm 45, from Oregon in the US originally although I have been living abroad for 20 years. I am the manager of two dissertation editing offices at a major university, I create and maintain the websites for these offices and write all content as well as lord it over my underlings. I do a bit of freelance editing and have a few websites. In other words, I love to sit on my butt for hours on end staring into my computers (Mac woman since 1986) or brooding over heavy academic texts written by non-native speakers of English. I have both BA and MA in history (medieval and modern, respectively).
I am married and have a fifteen year old daughter. No stress on the domestic front. Maybe too much fun and eating (daughter is five nine and has a BMI of 1
. In our free time daughter and I are usually with our horse (see photo), a 12 year old Trakehner stallion trained to Prix St. Georges level in dressage. Daughter is the competitive dressage rider-- I am a wannabe. Having Dante in our lives is a huge luxury and requires sacrifice financially.
Besides web stuff, my main hobby is photography, especially equestrian photography. I am the official photographer for the National Dressage Federation. My work has appeared in Federation publications and in the nation's leading equestrian magazine. My forte, however, is portraiture.
On the physical front, I am 173cm (five eight) and once upon a time weighed 68 kilos (148lbs) for years on end. As a teen I was deeply involved in sports and played soccer, volleyball, basketball, tennis, racquetball, downhill skiing, and horse riding. By 21 I had hiked to 18,000 feet in the Himalayas, enjoyed long distance bicycling, and went out clubbing a lot to dance. I ran off to Istanbul at 23 and married, did my MA, half a Ph.D...By 30 I was working on a green belt in karate.
Then, enter the child. Add long, painful death from cancer of beloved father. And mental health issues. And medications. And weight problems. And blaaaaaaah...weight problems....currently carrying about (20 kg) 50 pounds more than is comfortable.
My main issue seems to be the effect my medications have on my sense of self. In 2000 I was diagnosed with manic-depression. It is a mild form apparently, but still can be very disruptive. The meds make me unable to think in much more than the present, so while I am able to form the idea that I do not enjoy carrying this much weight and not being able to fit into any of my clothes, and while I KNOW what must be done to remedy this problem-- I am unable to hold the idea in my mind or to really care. Pre-medications I could get really focused and work up a healthy amount of disdain for any extra weight and get rid of it. Now holding the concept in my mind is so difficult.
My psychiatrist feels badly for "having done this" to me, but says it would be unwise to switch medications as this one is working very well for me in terms of evening out my mental fluctuations.
My husband signed us all up at a fitness club, so I've been lifting weights and treadmilling there two or three times a week.I ride Dante on Wednesdays. I continue to gain weight. It is all the sitting I do and crap I eat (obviously).
I am thinking about having a platform built to fit over my treadmill so I can walk while checking my emails and reading news, etc. That might help a bit. I am so damn sedentary.
My goal is gain muscles and lose fat, with a weight of a maximum of 74kg (163lbs). I'll be 45 in a few weeks. I think trying to get down to what I always tell myself is my Real Weight, 68kg (148 lbs, is not necessary. I would like to look elegant on my horse (and be a much improved athlete while doing it). Right now there is the gorgeous horse and me sitting on top, looking like a giant sack of potatoes. So in my head that is the image I have of how I want to be-- tall, fit, and showing it in those damn tight riding pants.