No support at home

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mummydee

Joined: Feb 10
Posts: 2,169

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Posted: 02 Apr 2013, 05:43
I totally agree with Kingkeld's post. Men have their 'issues' to deal with and may be insecure, But my question is why to we have to bend and coddle them? We are all adults and are making concsious decisions to do something good for our bodies and our health, so why do we have to give in to make them happy? I do not agree with give in and have a wee snack, or piece of b'day cake just because they bought it for you, They are not showing respect for you or your decisions. I agree with talking to them and I also like the people that just don't tell anyone they're on an eating plan. If you really need to have a 'sweet' or cake, why not look in the Atkins site for a recipe that will work for you.
elvenbeauty

Joined: Aug 10
Posts: 93

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Posted: 02 Apr 2013, 07:03
As much as I hate to admit this, I was a person who sabotages at one time. When my husband first started his weight journey 4 years ago, I would cook foods he wouldn't eat and get offended that he wouldn't eat them. After I started to see the results of his efforts, I changed my mindset. It wasn't until I really started my journey that I saw how hard it was for him to say no to me. I have to say no all the time now, and it is fulfilling when I stand up for myself, it is also hard.

I would have a heart to heart with him. Ask him for his support. If you say no cake, you mean no cake. It is not about hurting his feelings, it is about your health and well-being.

Good Luck on your Journey.
“It’s the little details that are vital. Little things make big things happen.” ~John Wooden
eKatherine

Joined: Aug 12
Posts: 1,286

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Posted: 02 Apr 2013, 10:22
Other people only have power over us that we give them. If he is trying to keep you from becoming healthy, that is manipulative.

You can't change other people. You can only change yourself.
mummydee

Joined: Feb 10
Posts: 2,169

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Posted: 03 Apr 2013, 07:26
Well said eKatherine! This thread has been bothering me, I never dreamed that people that love you would sabotage you, but it seems to happen alot. I also think it's about power and control. If he presents a cake to you and mentally manipulates you into eating 'just a piece' then he has control over you again. so sad, I hope everyone stays strong and takes control of your own lives, Good luck to all.
yankgal46

Joined: Feb 13
Posts: 183

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Posted: 03 Apr 2013, 08:24
I think for some keeping to yourself works better. I like for all to be aware so they don't push junk on me. I am very strong now and challenge anyone who is a "pusher" to bring it on! LOL
dashhoju

Joined: Aug 13
Posts: 10

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Posted: 09 Aug 2013, 12:49
My husband is one of those that has a faster than light metabolism and can eat whatever he wants w/o gaining weight. He likes his cookies and pies. He is completely understanding of what I am doing and why, so he keeps that stuff out of my face. He has a small fridge where he keeps his beer and any snacks like that as well as a high shelf, that I would have to get a ladder to reach. I can do the out of sight-out of mind thing and he gets to have his treats. It works for us.
tirjasdyn

Joined: May 07
Posts: 6

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Posted: 09 Aug 2013, 14:11
I started this journey over four years ago and crashed badly. My first goal is to lose the 40 pounds that I gained back over the last four years with my ex refusing to allow good food in the house, refusing to cook healthy or to help and years of demanding that I do things his way. I developed GI issues to the point I couldn't eat for four months, and I knew I had to get out. I've spent the five months since I left trying to get on track. I refuse to tell anyone what I'm doing now. I don't need any more ridicule.
jncboyer

Joined: Jul 13
Posts: 40

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Posted: 09 Aug 2013, 22:56
gmarie61 wrote:
My husband is very much against my dieting. He gets mad that i dont want birthday cake on my birthday, etc.


Judging from your profile, you don't need to lose any weight. You're 140lb and seem to be at least 5'8" tall, maybe taller. You look great in your picture. Maybe your husband is upset about your dieting because he thinks it's unhealthy for you. Have you consulted your doctor about this?
Take everything in moderation, deny yourself nothing, and try as many new experiences as possible.



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