Open Mouth....Insert Foot

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MoMMaBReNNaN

Joined: Sep 12
Posts: 24

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 10:30
i went to walmart yesterday with my 6 yr old daughter and my 4 yr old son. it was cold outside so I had stretchy pants and an oversized sweatshirt on (to cover my fat). As I am checking out at the register, I inform the cashier that I have 2 cases of water and a 40lb bag of dogfood on the bottom of my cart. She looks at me shocked and says real loud "You are lugging around these heavy items when you are pregnant! Where is your help" She looked at my daughter and said before I could even speak "Your mommy is having a baby and you are not helping her with these heavy things?" My mouth just dropped open. I was appaulded.
My daughter says "My mom is not pregnant, huh mommy". The cashiers face turned red and she got very quiet. Didnt even apologize. The worst part was I was so imbarassed and hurt, I couldnt even speak, We just walked away leaving the cart and unpaid merchandise on her register. I kept the tears in until I got home.
~Mini Goal #1 Weight 200lbs size 18 pants
~Mini Goal #2 Weight 190lbs size 16 pants
~Mini Goal #3 Weight 175lbs size 14 pants
~Mini Goal #4 Weight 160lbs size 12 pants
~Mini Goal #5 Weight 145lbs size 10 pants
~Mini Goal #6 Weight 130lbs size 8 pants
~Main Goal ** Weight 120lbs size 6 pants


"Hug More...Kiss Longer....And Say I Love You Always" - Terrie Federspiel



eKatherine

Joined: Aug 12
Posts: 1,286

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 10:46
I hope she learned something from the experience. You're doing the right thing. Ignore mindless people. Let go.
eg730

Joined: Dec 10
Posts: 60

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 11:11
I think Oprah had it right when she said something along the lines of, I wouldn't ask a woman if she is pregnant even if she goes into labor right in front of me!
Wyattj99

Joined: Jul 12
Posts: 213

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 11:19
It looks like you have a good start on losing weight...don't let one stupid person get you down Smile
1st Goal: 150 lbs
2nd Goal: 135 lbs
3rd Goal: 125 lbs


Jamie
MoMMaBReNNaN

Joined: Sep 12
Posts: 24

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 11:21
My daughter was a trooper though. She told me as we walked out.... That wasnt very nice of her mommy...Your fat is going away. I about broke down then and there. God gave us children for a reason. Mine is my strength.
~Mini Goal #1 Weight 200lbs size 18 pants
~Mini Goal #2 Weight 190lbs size 16 pants
~Mini Goal #3 Weight 175lbs size 14 pants
~Mini Goal #4 Weight 160lbs size 12 pants
~Mini Goal #5 Weight 145lbs size 10 pants
~Mini Goal #6 Weight 130lbs size 8 pants
~Main Goal ** Weight 120lbs size 6 pants


"Hug More...Kiss Longer....And Say I Love You Always" - Terrie Federspiel



eKatherine

Joined: Aug 12
Posts: 1,286

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 12:43
The cashier wasn't just rude; she realized she had broken several taboos and didn't know how to respond.

Most people treat visibly pregnant women like they are children or something. They think they have the right to get nosy and ask all sort of rude questions and then give unsolicited advice, as though being pregnant makes a woman simple. Pregnant women are a little annoyed by this but usually accept it.

Many people insult fat people behind their backs, but not to their faces.

There was no obvious way to get out of what she had done. An apology wouldn't have helped much at all.
FullaBella

Joined: Oct 12
Posts: 1,027

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 12:54
Definitely choose the Oprah way out ~ I won't ask a woman about her pregnancy even if she's in a maternity top with an arrow pointed at her belly unless SHE makes it a point to tell me. I think offering to get doors or lift heavy objects if able should be extended to anyone who appears to be struggling. I recall a friend telling me how when she was pregnant doors were opened, lines parted, etc., etc., but once she delivered she'd be struggling with the baby carrier in one hand, bag etc in the other and people just stood by ~ as if there were a whole different set of rules once the baby came into the world.

I know that's not the point MommaBren ~ hopefully she's learned a lesson and you survived a stupid person. I encountered a similar 'idiot' the other night at the $$$ restaurant ~ the maitre'd came by and asked 'well, ladies, did We get Full?' and I responded 'well, I don't know about you, but we did ...' His response was to look at me and answer 'Oh, I never eat.'
'Never?'
"All I drink is one health shake a day.'

Point? Did he share that with all patrons or just the overweight ones? Doesn't matter but if *I* were maitre'd of a restaurant I'd LIE and say 'oh, yes, indeed.. the staff and I sample the specials every night before we open' instead of making the guest feel like a 'hog' because they dared to eat a meal.

Stupid people. We can't control them - just our reactions to them.


I'm not losing WEIGHT. I'm converting FAT to MUSCLE to be healthier.
eKatherine

Joined: Aug 12
Posts: 1,286

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 13:00
My boyfriend is Asian and short. He has beautiful long hair, although his face and shape are clearly masculine. He gets called "ma'am" and we get called "ladies" all the time by people who aren't paying attention to the fact that their foot is rapidly moving in the direction of their mouth.
FullaBella

Joined: Oct 12
Posts: 1,027

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 13:40
Oh definitely a lot of foot chewers in the world these days.

The other day at a store I picked out a pair of sneakers displayed on sale but the register rang them full price. When I pointed it out (because, these days, I find MORE and MORE of this happening!) the sales clerk stated, after checking the aisle and seeing the 'sale' ticket displayed, 'Oh, fine, I'll honor the sale for you THIS time' as if she was doing me a favor or I was trying to trick her! I'd never been there and nearly left the sneakers on the counter with a piece of my mind. She must be related to Walmart Gal.


I'm not losing WEIGHT. I'm converting FAT to MUSCLE to be healthier.
FullaBella

Joined: Oct 12
Posts: 1,027

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 13:46
Dang, this thread is bringing up so many memories of these type people.

Once on an airplane the flight attendant made it a point to POINT OUT to me the high sodium content in bloody mary mix. I noted she did not give that health warning to the thin passenger in the row in front of me who ordered the same. Apparently heart attack warnings are only for the obese. No thin person ever had coronary issues.


I'm not losing WEIGHT. I'm converting FAT to MUSCLE to be healthier.
jeepjenn

Joined: Aug 12
Posts: 46

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 14:47
I think we should just remove all the warning labels off of all products....the stupid people will eventually die off that way.

Fat is HARD....Fit is HARD...Which HARD do you choose???
mars2kids

Joined: Mar 11
Posts: 1,240

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 16:27
LOL jeepjenn!! I am in agreement there. A few months after I had my son and was struggling to lose the 50 lbs. I'd gained and was self conscious about I had someone ask me about being pregnant. I about broke down, but I just said "I'm not pregnant." That person did apologize and felt like an idiot, but it still made me feel horrible. I took that though and remembered how I felt every time I didn't want to do a workout or I wanted to over eat and lost the weight. All people really need to come with filters.
Goals for 2014:
Complete Couch to 5K- DONE!!!
Sign up for and complete a 5K- DONE!! 35 mins.
Plan at least 3 outings with the family that involve being active- 2 done
meeel

Joined: Aug 11
Posts: 43

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 17:40
Girl!!! don't even sweat that!!! you would have been skinny! she would have something bad to say! you know there are some miserable people out there, so to make them "feel good" they have to try to hurt somebody, that's a fact, we can't help it, so forget that non interesting person, and keep doing what you are doing. Remember that we are all here to help each other.
amiraamoora

Joined: Dec 12
Posts: 1

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 19:17
Some people are just idiots. Don't even sweat it.
Lana J

Joined: May 09
Posts: 13

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Posted: 14 Dec 2012, 20:07
Remember that we are all here to help each other!!!!! Ditto!!!!!!
shrl1

Joined: Jan 10
Posts: 14

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Posted: 15 Dec 2012, 01:48
That is right, don't even sweat people who make you feel bad, because they feel bad and very insecure about thier selves. That is the reason they like to make others feel bad.
Wantingtobet...

Joined: Nov 12
Posts: 7

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Posted: 15 Dec 2012, 22:29
On a positive note I think she was trying to help a pregnant lady out and trying to get her some help. What she did do was insert foot to mouth, what an appropriate title. That experience sucked. And the cashier should've known better. I'm willing to be she will keep her mouth shut next time. Take care and keep at it!
ccisneros

Joined: Mar 10
Posts: 6

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Posted: 18 Dec 2012, 10:55
This used to happen to me all of the time. I even had one guy ask me 3 times in 1 minute about my baby. He was trying to make a point, since I was holding a wine glass, that he spilled to contents of on me. Needless to say, I was and am not expecting. I know the pain.

herennow

Joined: Feb 10
Posts: 52

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Posted: 18 Dec 2012, 13:10
I have to say, I can see the value in Oprah's advice. Funny story: When I was younger, there was a young mother I had babysat for only a couple of times before. (Her youngest was a two year old.) One day when I arrived, she was wearing a grey t-shirt that said, (exact quote) "It's not that I'm fat, it's just that I'm pregnant." I was pretty surprised, so I read it a couple of times, thought how cute it was and commented, "Oh, I didn't know you were pregnant!" She said, "I'm not, I'm just wearing the shirt." "OH!" "OUCH!"

(Case in point! True story!) Anyway, now I don't ask . . .

As everyone has said, I'm sure you've moved on by now. Just from your picture and the things you've posted about yourself, you seem absolutely darling and so very likable!!! You certainly have the right spirit and attitude. You also sound determined enough to make this happen! My very best to you!!! Keep up the good work!!!
Poulougirl6

Joined: Dec 12
Posts: 1

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Posted: 18 Dec 2012, 20:42
I'm so sorry to hear that you went through this, people can be so mean and cruel. How dare she just assume that you were pregnant. People are so quick to judge people, again; so sorry. Keep your head up and we will make it through this battle.



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